IC pain and taking care of your family - Interstitial Cystitis Network Support Forum

alison d · 03-26-2002, 07:48 AM

I need some serious advice. i am only 21 years old and I got married two years ago and i gave birth to my first child 9 months ago. I have had IC for about four years now. I have not been in remission yet, I have chronic pain every single day of my life and I don't know how to balance my pain and taking care of my family. My husband used to be really supportive but I think that he is getting tired of it but so I am I and what I am supposed to do about, it is not like I wanted this and if I could get rid of it believe me I would in a heartbeat. It is harder every day to deal with my life and on top of all my pain and fighting with my husband I am suffering still from post-paturm depression. I think it is just to much for me to handle, I feel like I am drowning in all my stress and I don't know what to do. Somebody please help me. If anybody out there has any suggestions or knows what I am going through please write me back. I need someone!!! [img]confused.gif[/img]

***ICNDonna*** · 03-26-2002, 10:17 AM

Please seek some help from your doctor. It sounds very much like you could be suffering from clinical depression, which can be helped by medications.

Is there a pain enter near where you live? If so, there may be help for you there.

And let us know how you are doing.

Sending healing thoughts,
Donna

Teri · 03-26-2002, 10:53 AM

My daughter went thru this after her 3rd child was born (she does not have IC, thank God) and her ob/gyn immediately put her on prozac and it's done wonders for her. Talk to your dr....they are now using alot of anti-depressants to treat chronic pain. BUT, you have to take the first step. Your dr doesn't know how serious it is until you tell him/her.

wishing you the very very best~

jschalleur · 04-01-2002, 06:07 AM

Alison,
First of all, you have taken your first step. Asking for help is soooooo hard. And those of us with IC need a lot of help! I agree with the others...start with the help of a doctor. Your OB is a great place to start. I was on Zoloft for a while because I felt the same way you do...overwhelmed, angry, frustrated, in pain, and totally alone. I also sought the help of a therapist. It has worked for me.

Try talking to your husband too. Sometimes they get frustrated because they can't help you. But let him know that a hug is all you need and I bet he'll jump at the chance to make you feel better.

Most importantly, know that you are never alone in this. We can all appreciate how much you are suffering. Scream and yell if you have to...but don't ever give up! Your symptoms will eventually be managable again. Take a deep breath, and give yourself the chance to start over. Keep a journal, write down how you feel...share this with your doctors...all of them.

I hope and pray that you find relief...and soon. See your OB and/or urologist right away! They will listen!

Best wishes!
Jen [img]biggrin.gif[/img]

alison d · 04-02-2002, 08:33 AM

thank you all so much for the advice, i really appreciate it. I am so grateful to know that there are actually people out there who know how i feel and have been there before. I thank God that I found this website and people like you. Now I know that i am not alone after all. Thanks alot and God Bless Everyone. [img]smile.gif[/img]

Michelle in AR · 04-02-2002, 02:13 PM

Hey, Alison. I'm also a Mom and have IC. Mine, however, is minute right now. I'm not in a great deal of pain lately. Please see your doctor. Call them. They can help you and if they don't, find a new one. Please do this. You owe it to yoruself and to your family.. Hugs, Michelle

Gabi · 04-02-2002, 04:11 PM

Alison,

I just wanted to reiterate that you really need to seek out a pain center and get some pain control. I don't mean to scare you (and I'm certainly a rare case), however, my IC pain didn't go into remission for 15 years. It barely even fluctuated, and because of my age, I couldn't get any pain medication for the first 8 years of pain.

I now have the pain somewhat under control and it has had an absolutely remarkable effect on my attitude and ability to basically deal with life. I used to be hanging on by a tiny thread and now feel like I'm finally up out of the pit!

I hope that your remission is right around the corner and that you become one of the lucky ones that never gets it back!!

Wishing you the best, Gaby

***ICNLesa*** · 04-03-2002, 01:11 AM

Hi Alison,

I have a 9 month old too and I think you and I have experienced some of the same things. Having a new baby is such a huge life change and it's difficult sometimes to adjust. I find that I have almost no time for myself anymore...no time to nurture my soul or lick my IC wounds. That has been the hardest to deal with for me and it has increased my stress incredibly. Everyday is a race and I'm just plain exhuasted. I think it's extremely important to clear our heads and figure out what we need to handle all of this. For me, I NEED some quiet time every day...even if it's 30 minutes. So.....hubby and I have talked about ways for me to get that. For you it may be some added support and healing time for your body. Whatever it is, ask for what you need. Make sacrifices elsewhere if you have to. It's so important for you, and your new family that you are okay. Sometimes we can't handle everything on our own and we need to get some outside help...whatever it takes! We're here for you!

ICNLesa

Shelleynz · 04-03-2002, 11:22 AM

Hi
I can sure understand how stressful life can be with IC and a baby. I had 3 kids under 5 when I got IC and some how struggled along while miserable with uncontrolled symptoms for 7 yrs. Back then I didn't have any info. about IC and my doctor's weren't able to find any treatments that worked for me either.
I agree with the others here that you should see you doctor.
Shelley

marie22 · 04-05-2002, 06:35 PM

Alison,

Hi, I am 22, have been married for over 2 yrs, and expecting a baby on Tues. My worst symptom with IC is pain. I have pain that never goes away. I think you should try and see a pain dr. The pain dr I had before I got pregnant was treating my depression and pain. I was bugging the uro for pain meds for quite awhile until he got tired of it and sent me to a pain dr. He was such a good pain dr but, I recently found out that he is closing his office which makes me pretty upset. I have an appointment with another pain dr in about a month and, I am hoping that he is just as good. The way I feel is that if I could just get the pain under control I wouldn't be as depressed. I have thought about seeing a psychiatrist also, maybe I will after the baby is here. It usually takes awhile to get an appointment with a pain dr. You could see if your PCP or uro would refer you to them. I understand about your husband. My husband tries to understand but, he gets tired of hearing me complain all the time. It is hard not to think about it when the pain just never leaves. Here is my email if you ever want to talk tanis@activecom.net

Good luck!

Marie

alison d · 04-11-2002, 05:56 AM

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to say Thank You to everyone that has replied to my message. I t really means alot to me when I know that there are people out there that know how I am feeling and actually care about how I feel. I am getting a little bit better with my depression. I talked to my husband and he is helping out alot more, I dont feel so overwhelmed anymore. Anyway, Thanks again for everyones encouraging words, I sincerely appreciate it.

BLynn · 05-03-2002, 03:58 AM

I'm glad to hear that you are doing better. Having some quiet time is very helpful. I'm thankful that I did not get this disease when my children were any younger. They are all in school all day now. It is very helpful that I can rest a little before I go get them from school.