I need other Mom's help, please

[Michelle in AR]

I have been having trouble lately with stress. I'm stressed about money, work (my boss is very high maintenance), kids (ages 10 1/2 & 4 1/2), husband, and home (our rent went up) , and car (our van died and we bought a 99 Taurus and also have to have full coverage insurance now). I have not been sleeping. Not eating properly. Trting to lose weight by not exactly starving myself, but not always eating when I'm hungry. I remember hearing once that if you are hungry, drink a glass of water and wait an hour and if you are still hungry then eat something. It seems to be working for me. I feel a little difference in my clothes. Anyway, I am also having week long flares of IC pain and urgency. I'm taking my meds for that. I am worried because I have been having hives lately at times of high stress. My lip will swell to 2X it's normal size. My body will break out with these itchy red welts. It's awful. I have to take benedryl to control them, and it knocks me out. What do you do to control stress? <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[banghead]" /> Stress release? I am open to ideas. Thanks so much. Michelle in KC

[bren]

Michelle,

I am so sorry to hear that so many stressful things are going on in your life right now. I will be praying for you. About the hives, could they be caused by one of the meds you are taking? I only ask because I had a reaction like you are describing one time and it was a reaction to an antibiotic. In addition to taking some Benadryl for itching (it knocks me out too), I also tried Benadryl cream - sort of helped. Do you think calamine lotion would work on the hives?

About stress . . . I usually respond by eating, but that's not really all that helpful. [img]wink.gif[/img]

Sometimes getting away for even a few minutes from a tense situtation can renew perspective and give new energy to continue on. When I worked full-time and things got hairy, getting out of the office for a short walk (usually to the deli <img src="graemlins/lmao.gif" border="0" alt="[lmao]" /> )often helped. Now, as a stay-at-home mom, if things are awful I ask hubby to watch our daughter for a little while and I go to the library. There are also a few good friends I call for help or to just listen while I babble. It's not a cure, but it helps.

Hope this helps and that things get a little easier for you!

Sending warm thoughts your way,
Bryn

[Cawaggi]

When I feel stressed, the best thing I can do is drop everything and go to a movie or something. That's not always possible for me though because of the kids, husband, etc. So what I found helped this summer was to get a good book, a really good book, and take time to read some... it's an escape, not quite as good as going out and getting away from it all, but it helps. My kids knew that when I was reading, they could either read with me, or find something to do for a while! Also, someone suggested taking a walk daily, and that works for me too. I think something in the sunlight is good for your mood. Also, try to laugh...watch a funny movie once a week or read a funny book. Things like that really lift my spirits for days. I am a full time student on top of being a mom of four so I am always looking for stress reducers. This one I just found in the past year: spend time with friends that make you laugh, that look at the positive side of life. Sometimes we all need to whine a little, but in the end, if I can end up laughing, I can deal with whatever is bothering me. I can really tell a difference in me if I'm around negative people, and I don't mean people that are just having a bad day or that just need help, I mean a really negative attitude about everything, all the time! That can make ME stress! [img]wink.gif[/img] I'm sorry you are stressed, and I understand completely why...you've had a rough time lately! I hope this helps!

[ICNDonna]

How about some grandmotherly advice? First of all, it is very doubtful that your hives and swelling are caused by stress --- you must be allergic to something. It could be a medication. Even if you have been taking the same meds for a long time, you could have developed an allergy to one or more of them. One way to find out would be to talk to your doctor about stopping each of your meds, one at a time, for a few days to see how it effects your problem. If the rash improves absent a medication, then worsens when you begin again, you have your answer and can look for other alternatives. It could also be a food allergy --- again, it could be a new allergy. I ate tomatoes all of my life until about 1985, at which time I developed a severe allergy to them.

Have you considered finding another job? I remember one time when I had a very demanding, micro-manager for a supervisor --- I came home and was whining a bit about it --- my husband responded with a hug and the fact that I was not in bondage; I could find another place to work. It turned out the supervisor micro'd herself into dismissal so I didn't have to change.

Also, in your shoes, I think I might wait a bit until things level off before dieting, which can be a real trial for anyone.

And last of all, please know how very much I wish that your tomorrow will be better.

<img src="graemlins/grouphug.gif" border="0" alt="[grouphug]" />
Donna

[sharon429]

I also think that this wouldn't be a good time to diet. It's probably adding a lot more stress on you then you realize. I know when I'm hungry everything seems to be 10 times worse.
Also, since your not getting enough sleep that really adds to everything.
I would try and take some cat-naps or go to bed early. The more sleep you get the better you'll feel.
If you can't talk to your friends about what's going on a really good thing I do is write. I keep a journal and if I don't write in there I just get my pad out and write. It's good therapy.
Like someone else said - A movie is a good stress reducter. If you can't go to see a movie then rent a real funny one. Something to get your mind off of things. Reading is sometimes hard for me - expecially when my mind is spinning out of control - I can't concentrate on the book.

Sharon