tolit humor

[Dixiefireball]

The following are away messages to use with your instant messaging client while you are in the bathroom.

Nature is calling and I'm answering!

HELP! I'm trapped in the toilet, I fell in. Can you please help me... Hello... Hello.. Uh-oh i think someone is coming.

I'm taking advantage of indoor pluming! I'll be right back!

Doctors suggest that you should drink at least 64 oz. of water a day. Being a drone, I make sure to do this. Unfortunately it does have some side effects... Leave a message, I'll be back soon.

It's that time of week again. I am in the shower.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNO QRSTUVWXYZ

If your wondering where the P is... its about to run down my leg in a second.

When you got to go, you got to go.

I am not here I'm on the potty, but don't leave if you're a hotty

I am taking a shower. By the way %n(their screen name) you are starting to smell you need to take one too!

I'm in a foreign land far far away... Oh wait, this is just the bathroom.

Making an offering to the porcelain god... be back in about 20 minutes.

I'm in the bathroom right now...Be back in a splash.

Dirty boy(or girl) no longer... it's SHOWER TIME!!!

Drop me a message while I drop something in the toilet!

I'm feeding the potty, please leave a message and I'll get back to you when its full!

King(or Queen) (your name) is on the throne.

Making my bladder gladder.

I've to run cause I got the runs.

Making my bladder flatter.

If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down.

Fiber cleans everything but the toilet.

Doody calls.

Rub-a-dub-dub there better not be three men in my tub.

Somewhere over the toilet.

I'm at the bank making a deposit, no not that kind of bank, I'm on the toilet.

You know the expression, "I have to pee like a race horse?" That's what I'm doing right now.

Making big waves in the toilet.

I'm making a donation to tha urination station.

Swish, swish, goes the pee.
Plop, plop, goes the poop.
I'm in the bathroom!

How dry I am.
How wet I'll be.
If I don't find,
The bathroom key.

You know you are addicted to the internet when you refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

Peebis yellow, dooty is brown, when the sewer brakes, its all over the town.

Dropping the kids off at the pool.

There is a place...
Like no other place...
A place of learning...
A place of hope...
A place of warmth...
A place of security...
A place of healing...
A place of relaxation...
A place of love...
And no matter what, a part of you is always left behind.

You've guessed it. I'm on the can.

I'm hot... I'm steamy... I'm wet... I'm in the shower.

Splish, splash, I am taking a bath.

Visiting the greatest nation is the world... Urination.

I'm draining out my fluids.

In about 5 minutes I will weigh about 5 pounds less than I do right now.

Be right back I am feeding the toilet its dinner.

I am diposing some of my nautral resorces.

I'm trying out my new toilet paper.

Drop me a message while I drop something in the toilet.

Doing some consulting with my toilet right now.

I am going to the potty so don't leave if your a hottie.

I'm in the shower, I'll be back in a splash.

You have to hold it, because I can't any longer.

Reigning on my throne.

Doodie called and now we're having a long conversation in the bathroom.

I'm magically changing the color of the toilet water.

Watch out shower here I come.

Making a sacrifice to the toilet god.

I'm at the Log Dropping Ceremonies.

Seeing if there really are 1000 sheets of toilet paper in each roll.


Gone pissin'

Feeding the toilet.

Hey I am relieving myself, I'll be back when its all over.

If you sprinkle when you tinkle please be neat and wipe the seat!

Rubber Ducky, your the one, you make my bath time so much fun! In case you didn't get the picture, I am in the shower.

The bathroom is a good place to be, When you just drank a gallon of water!

I am probably far away in another land.....or I just might be on the toilet.

The average person goes to the bathroom 6 times per day. This is one of those times.

Sorry I'm not here at my computer at the present moment, but I am on the toilet. If you would like to come over and bring me some toilet paper that would be greatly appreciated.

Washing away yesterday. Cleansing for today.

It's "Potty Time."

How dry I am, how wet I'll be, if you don't stop, IMing me. You got offline, now I'm heading for the door... oops it's to late...it's on the bathroom floor.

If you are reading this then that means I have gone to a better place... yep I am on the toilet.

I'm off to the urination station.

I am taking care of some buisness, that just happens to be taken care of in a small room with a tub and toilet.

Be back in a flush... I mean flash.

I am currently relieving the stress that's on my bladder.

I'm stuck in the potty.

Riding the porcilien pony.