How to deal with birthday parties???? - Interstitial Cystitis Network Support Forum

jvr · 11-05-2009, 12:27 PM

Hi,

Does anyone have any ideas on how to deal with birthday parties? My daughter has been invited to a couple of parties recently and I'm getting anxiety on how to deal with the food situation. It seems like a lot of parties do pizza and chocolate cake. I'm not quite sure how to handle this with other parents or how to not make my daughter feel completely bad and left out. I thought about emailing the parents and asking straight up what up what will be served. I'm thinking that's probably pretty rude....I just thought maybe if I explain that she has food allergies maybe it wouldn't be so bad? I don't know. Any ideas?

Thank you so much,
Jill

***ICNDonna*** · 11-05-2009, 02:13 PM

I feel like I can really answer this question. My youngest son, now an adult, had severe food allergies as a child. I always called ahead and asked what was being served. When I explained that he had allergies, it was never a problem to find out. It was really amazing how well people responded --- and if there wasn't going to be anything he could have, I offered to provide an okay treat for each of the children so there would be something that was okay for him. It's not rude at all --- and nearly everyone is familiar with the word "allergy."

Donna

ddktt · 11-05-2009, 03:40 PM

Like Donna my now adult son can't have any dairy (would throw up if he even got a little!--what a pain). I used a similar strategy. He really could not have anything at birthday parties--they put milk products in so much stuff--so I always just packed him a snack of things he could eat that he liked. I remember "pizza bologna". I would cut a piece of bologna like a pizza.

I always gave the teachers at school a bag of his favorite candy to keep in the cupboard for unexpected treats in the classroom.

Even at his prom in high school he got there and there was NOTHING he could eat and they wouldn't let him out to get something for security reasons. He was starving. You always have to plan ahead.

He's a happy productive 20 year old now so he survived

jvr · 11-05-2009, 05:33 PM

Oh, thank you so much ladies

I think I will contact the parents and ask about what will be served. I forget that so many other children struggle with dietary issues unrelated to IC. I do agree and must remember to always plan ahead! I really appreciate each of your input. You really helped me figure this out!

Thanks again,
Jill

***ICNDonna*** · 11-06-2009, 03:27 AM

When my son started school and I was registering him, each year I would have a talk with his teachers --- and the food services department about his allergies. Those teachers would let me know ahead of time if there was going to be a special event so I could be sure there would be something there for him. And the kitchen kept popsicles in the freezer for when they were serving ice cream (milk allergy). Most of the time he took his lunch, but they sent menus home with the kids so he could sometimes have a school lunch.

I think you'll find people are very helpful when it comes to little ones.

Donna

***Julie B*** · 11-07-2009, 08:18 PM

I just wanted to encourage you as well. Both of my daughters work for Kindercare, and they have so many children with allergies, it is astounding. Peanuts, milk, melon, barley, you name it, someone is allergic to it.

People are generally very kind and understanding.

PS: I just tell people I am allergic to (strawberries, chocolate, etc) these days and no one blinks an eye. It isn't always worth going into an explanation of IC.

Sending gentle hugs to you and your little one........