I'm here

**iwant2help2** · 05-18-2004, 11:55 AM

I live in rural Ontario if any other Canadians wish to chat.

**Lou** · 05-20-2004, 04:26 PM

I don't live anywhere near you

, but how are things going for you these days...? Good, I hope.

**iwant2help2** · 05-21-2004, 06:28 AM

Thanks for asking. Things are not too bad pain wise. I take narcotics daily - I have to at this point just to function but I found one that's not too bad and not really too much of a side effect either so I'm quite lucky there.

I am having quite the anxiety problem though. I don't know if I'm depressed or not but I know my stomach is in knots 24 - 7. I take bits of diazapam which helps but I wish I could just conquer this on my own.

I'm always thinking of down the road which is where I get into trouble. You see I lost everything...my career, my home, my husband, my savings, everything. I'm okay right now, but I'm frantic about the future and what good does worry do? Nothing of course except it's quite self-destructive.

I wish I had more faith, I mean things always have a way of working out one way or another right? I'm just having a really hard time dealing with this one.

Any advice would be great, we'll talk again, xo

**Lou** · 05-21-2004, 07:17 PM

Well, you know, I think that heavy meds can cause anxiety. I know how you feel, cause I've been there. But things have settled down to the point where I don't need narcotics for now

Someone once called my illness "bleak"...and apart from everything else, it is a bleak, lonely, dark thing. But when I do have good days...they are absolutely wonderful, and I enjoy everything am able to experience in the moment. The future is not here, and it is useless to worry about it. You're right.

Things will get better...you'll see...even though it doesn't seem so now, especially with the losses that you have suffered...things WILL get better, slowly and surely.
Chin up,
Lou

**iwant2help2** · 05-22-2004, 09:37 AM

Thanks for responding

(I have to get used to those little smiley things...I accidently "mooned" someone on this site and I had already posted it so it was too late to correct!...embarrassing!)

I think too that maybe meds are playing a role in anxiety, albeit maybe a smaller one. I have suffered from anxiety before, but you know that saying "ignorance is bliss?" Well I didn't even know that I had IC so my worrying and fear was a lot less then. I didn't know the monster I would have to battle and it was easier just to think I had a fussy bladder and it would (and did) settle down.

Now though, after coming out of remission I've experienced pain that I sincerely never knew existed. I mean I know there's pain, but this? I never would have believed it without experiencing it firsthand. I find myself so compassionate now to those who are ill whereas when I was young I may have thought, give them a few months and they'll be back to it. There's a pill for everything, right? WRONG, WRONG AND WRONG! What a cruel eye-opener. Enough of my whining for now. I have made a couple of couselling appts. and I just hope I can stop crying enough to get out what I need to in case someone can help

What kind of treatment are you on if that's not too personal a question? I really am not familiar with the proper etiquette on this thing...sorry about that. I love to hear about other people so if you feel like writing, I'm 'a listenin'
Take good care of yourself, xo

**lalarainbow** · 05-22-2004, 10:16 AM

Hi there,
Sorry I am not near but I am in rural NS! I don't know anyone personally who has IC. Just know the great ones on line.. stess can be a big figure in causing flares for me.. I was dignosed last July.. I have been on an anti-depressant for about 13 years.. I take a very small dose but it seems to help most of the time..
It does help if you can talk things out with someone.. I write things down so I can remember what I want to say..
I am on Elmiron .. I have Pyridium and ditropan when I am in flare.. but the pyridium makes me really sick...so only take it when I am desperate..It sure helps with the pain and wish I could take it and not get sick.
Hope you are feeling better and that things will look sunnier real soon.
~~Pam~~:thumbsup:

**iwant2help2** · 05-22-2004, 10:33 AM

Thanks for the hello. I know several people from Nova Scotia. Where are you from or near to? (if that's not too personal)

I'm so glad the elmiron is helping - it made me so much worse

which was soooo disappointing!!

Pyridium is completely uneffective for me, but I know what you mean if you are talking about nausea. You can try this: take the pyridium with a meal but eat half first, then take your med, then finish the other half of the meal. That has helped me every time I had stomach trouble with a med, maybe it might help you??

You sound to be relatively well, good for you, we'll talk again, prayers