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View Full Version : :lmao: Handy Cleaning Tips :biglaugh:


Katrina
08-27-2004, 09:22 AM
I loved this

Handy Cleaning Tips
>
> Dirt
> Layers of dirty film on windows and screens provide a helpful
> filter against harmful and aging rays from the sun. Call it an SPF
> factor of 15 and leave it alone.
>
> Cobwebs!
> Artfully draped over lampshades reduce the glare from the bulb,
> thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If someone points out that
> the light fixtures need dusting, simply look confused and exclaim
> "What? And spoil the mood?" (Or just throw glitter on them & call
> them holiday decorations.)
>
>
> Pet Hair
> Explain the mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways by >
> claiming you are collecting it there to use for stuffing hand-sewn
> play animals for underprivileged children. (Also keeps out cold drafts in
> winter.)
>
> Guests
> If unexpected company is coming, pile everything unsightly into
> one room and close the door. As you show your guests through your
> tidy home, rattle the doorknob vigorously, fake a growl and say, "I'd
> love you to see our den, but Fluffy hates to be disturbed and the shots are SO
> expensive."
>
> Dusting
> If dust is REALLY out of control, simply place a showy urn on
> the coffee table and insist that "This is where Grandma wanted us to
> scatter her ashes."
General Cleaning

> Mix one-quarter cup pine-scented household cleaner with four
> cups of water in a spray bottle. Mist the air lightly. Leave
> dampened rags in conspicuous locations. Develop an exhausted look,
> throw yourself on the couch and sigh, "I clean and I clean and I
> still don't get anywhere."
>
> As a last resort, light the oven, throw a teaspoon of cinnamon
> in a pie pan, turn off oven and explain that you have been baking cookies for a bake sale for a favorite charity and haven't had time to clean...Works every time.
> Another favorite, I think from Erma Bombeck - always keep several get well cards on the mantle so if unexpected guests arrive, you can say

> you've been sick and unable to clean

Well, that one shouldn't be too hard for me. :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Iris
08-27-2004, 12:40 PM
Hi Katrina, great post I loved it, thanks and hugs Iris. :woohoo: :thumbsup: :grouphug: :flower:

Dixiefireball
08-27-2004, 12:47 PM
loved it

windwalker
08-27-2004, 12:55 PM
whoever wrote that must've been in my house! LOL

Sarojini
08-27-2004, 03:06 PM
LOVED IT!!!!! :) :lmao: :biglaugh:

jen_dahling
08-27-2004, 03:12 PM
:thumbsup: :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh:

arcticfox
08-27-2004, 04:28 PM
That was awesome! Thanks Katrina! :lmao:

gwynnie
08-29-2004, 08:32 AM
that was funny.....thanks