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gwyn
05-02-2004, 12:57 AM
Hi all,

i am back and there are so many things i want to tell u all ,firstly i'd like to indulge myself in a moment of silence in memory of AUNT DEB. she is truly an IC angel to me and i really appreciate all she has done for me.next, i would like to share my story:::

i am going to be 24 years old on 9may2004.i am from singapore. i have had ic for 2 years now and i was diagnosed in singapore but the treatments were not available in singapore i was even interviewed by the news reporter:(below is the copy of the article)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The pain was like daggers stabbing me
She has to go to toilet every 15 mins because of rare bladder disorder.

By Bian Yu Wei

THIS former air stewardess and model has a painful story to tell.

Of how a rare disease has made life hell for her over the last two years.

It attacks a very private part of the body. Yet she wants everyone to hear of it. Because she feels no one else should suffer as she did.

The disease, called Interstitial Cystitis (IC), is not easy to diagnose, and if there is more awareness of it, she hopes, others may get help earlier.

This is the story of Gwyn Ngan, 23, who is now a shadow of her former self:

I am an ex-Singapore Girl and model but now I lie in a hospital bed.


I used to weigh a healthy 47kg for my 1.7 m frame.

Today, I'm a gaunt 39kg.

I'm a victim of a disorder that leaves me in too much pain to walk, talk, or sleep.

Bit by bit, it robbed me of my life.

And I was in the prime of my life.

After graduating from Temasek Polytechnic with a Diploma in Marketing, I was an air stewardess with Singapore Airlines for nine months, before joining an advertising firm.

I had also been a freelance model since I was 16, and was most recently the face for a newly-launched drink.

Now, I can't even go to the movies without checking where the toilets are first. And I can't remember the last time I sat down for an entire movie, without frequent breaks.

I can't have a normal chat over coffee, without interrupting my friends every 15 minutes or so, to go to the toilet.

Some friends thought I was weird and imagining everything.

But others have stood by me, and I am thankful for that.

It wasn't just my friends who thought I was imagining things. The first few doctors I saw suggested it was all in my head.

All those months, nobody knew what was wrong.

Now my doctor believes that I may have contracted IC, a rare and mostly incurable disorder that affects the bladder.

It was a diagnosis by exclusion, meaning I was tested for everything from stones to cancer.

IC is the only thing left.

Its causes are not known, its symptoms are very similar to that of other urinary disorders, and there is no definitive test to diagnose it. (See other report.)

That's what makes it so scary.

My suffering began two years ago when I started experiencing pain whenever I passed urine. Controlling my urge to urinate also became harder.

The numerous general practitioners I saw diagnosed me as having contracted urinary tract infection (UTI), something doctors say is fairly easy to treat with one course of antibiotics.

However, even after three courses of antibiotics, I kept getting the severe pain.

In fact, it became more frequent, and eight months ago, it developed into an everyday occurrence.

To make matters worse, I began to feel a sharp pain in my vagina even when I was not passing urine.

Finally I began getting sudden severe attacks of pain in my entire lower body.

That scared my family members, and left me feeling that there was little hope.

The immense pain that tortured me was like daggers stabbing me. I really felt like dying.

And each time it lasted for four to six unbearable hours.

I have been in and out of hospitals. And I am getting some help now.

The interval between each acute attack has lengthened, but there still seems to be nothing that can stop the gnawing pain.

Or stop the need to go to the toilet every quarter of an hour.

Not even the stacks of pills I have to swallow every day.

On top of that, I may also have an infection.

The most important thing on my mind now is public awareness.

I want to tell people about this disorder, that it affects not only women, but some men as well.

I want awareness, especially for those 1,000 or so women out there who may not know what is affecting them, who may be suffering in silence.

And they may be delaying seeking specialist treatment, thinking that they have simple UTI.

I hope that sharing my story will encourage people, especially women, who form 90 per cent of all those who suffer from IC, to seek immediate treatment from a uro-gynaecologist, if they have symptoms like mine.

This is especially because urine culture tests may show up clear, but IC may still be there.

I really hope that my situation, my two years of GP-hopping, will not repeat itself.

I still look forward to going back to teaching.

I was giving tuition at a Residents' Committee in Seng Kang for about a month, but I had to let the students down many times due to sudden attacks.

I hope I can be well enough just to teach, because I love children so much.

The doctors say the disease need not stop me from having children of my own.

But I dare not hope for so much right now.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------end of article

So i came to new york, hoping that i can find better doctors and treatments or help. now i rented a room in flushing, nyc. and i began my search . i went to the ER so many times and i just cant stand it anymore. 1- i am not a us citizen, 2- i have no insurance 3- i think i am dying 4 - the doctors are too mean n they dont understand anything!


on 30th april, i was in so much pain that i could not even walk at all and the ambulance sent me to New york queens hospital ER dept. the people at the triage were like ---its YOU AGAIN???? i was in so much pain i did not care about the looks they were giving to each other .

i was put onto the bed and i waited for like 45min before the doc came to see me n i was in sooo much pain i could not even leave the toilet i pulled the emergency string and waited 10 MINUTES before a nurse, cynthia came to me when she heard me shouting for help and i was given morphine injection and helped out of the toilet in a wheelchair to my bed .

i stayed there tearing all the way because i was in soooo much pain the tears just flow out and i was in this curled up position on the bed hugging my legs, twisting and turning and the pain was so bad that i wanted to bang my head on the wall so that i can knock out and i wont feel the pain..i kept asking for the doctor who never came, n i was in soo much pain in the toilet the nurse gave me a pain killler to eat and when i was barely walking to the bed , the doctor told me:

You HAVE to go now.. there is nothing we can do for you and you HAVE to go now.here is the presciption for the medicine and you can get dressed and GO NOW!!!!

i was like----i am in SOOOO much pain that i can barely walk and they are forcing me to leave??? i asked them for more pain killers but they told me i had enough n to ask me to get it from the prescription!!! so i just stayed at my bed for a while ,trying to pack my stuff (WHILE IN PAIN)

n this nice nurse-cynthia came along and offered me some food in a tray -which i gladly took --i was in there for quite a while n i was HUNGRY--alhtough i was in pain. so, i started eating and halfway through.....the doc SCOLDED the nurse cynthia : why did u feed her ?? we just asked her to go !!! she has to leave now , we need the bed for another paitent!!! OH MY GOD !!!!!!! i overheard that and i was FURIOUS!!!!!!!!!i stopped eating n changed out of my dress and i wrote a thank you note to cynthia , took down all the doc's names and left the hospital . and then i went to another hospital -elmhurst hospital-ER dept...

i am sooooo upset!!!! i cant stand this anymore!!!!!!!!!! what is going on here?? can i sue these people???what am i going to do?? how can i get help i am in so much pain most of the time i just CANT do anything!!!!!!!!!!!!!

please help me and if you can , please CALL me-1-646-637-4905
thank you!!!!!!!!!:love: ;) ;) ;)

dyno
05-02-2004, 02:42 AM
Gwyn,:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:
I don't know the area you are in but maybe someone will come along from that area and be able to offer some ideas.


We all care.

kcjmom
05-02-2004, 02:54 AM
:grouphug: OMG, I can't beleive what I just read!!
Dr. Moldwin, who wrote the IC book is on Long Island if you think you could get out there. I don't how much he charges.
My other thought, if you think you could make it out to NJ, my Dr.'s office is connected with a Hospital, you may be able to get a reduced fee if you don't have insurance. I'm not sure, but it's worth a try. I only just started seeing him and really like him.
The Hospital is in New Brunswick, so you could easily take a train out of NY and then it would just be a short cab ride to the Hospital.
Email me if you'd like more info. kmpirro@msn.com Tina

ICNDonna
05-02-2004, 03:07 AM
:grouphug: My suggestion would be to see a doctor in his office --- Emergency Room is not necessarily the best option --- usually they will offer some short term relief, but they normally will refer you back to your doctor for continuing treatment. I use ER only if my doctor's office is closed.

I know there are some excellent urologists in NY --- I hope you will be able to see one soon.

Sending warm healing thoughts,
Donna

dyno
05-02-2004, 03:16 AM
Gywn,
I just thought of something else. Where I used to live in IA, they had a university hospital where people who didn't have insurance could go. They had all kind of clinics there and it was good care. Also county hospitals took people with no insurance. You may want to see if NY has any such places.

I agree with Donna that seeing a Dr. in an office vrs. the ER is better. I hope you can find someone.:kissing:

kelly McC
05-02-2004, 04:24 AM
Gywn,
I am so sorry that happend to you. I know how it feels to be asked to leave and the pain is so immense. My doctor did that to me twice. He is no longer my doctor. I will keep you in my prayers and hope you get the treatment you deserve.Best wishes and take care,
Kelly

Cali girl
05-02-2004, 05:53 AM
Gwyn,

I will keep you in my prayers. I do hope that you get some relief soon. I am sending you lots of gentle hugs and kisses.

:grouphug: :kiss: :pray:

Cali

Dixiefireball
05-02-2004, 09:43 AM
i'm so sorry this happen to you some people just don't understand.:( but thank goodness there was a rn there that cared.
I hope you get some medical help soon for your ic.
if your not working you may be able to get on medicaid temp. this will give you some inc and a way to get your medicine i don't know if you have to be a citizen i do believe you could get on it temp at least.
please let us know how you are.
sending you Gentle Hugs and alot of Prayers
Rhonda

sleepyangel30
05-02-2004, 10:28 AM
I'am so sorry that this happend to you, Don't you worry god will take care of the ignorants, You are in my prayers take care god bless you!!!

SheriG
05-02-2004, 10:31 AM
Hi Gwyn,
I had such a range of emotions reading your post...sad, sick, and enraged. You were treated so poorly, and I just feel terrible about it. Here you make the trip all the way from Singapore to get some good medical care, and this is what you got...:cussing: Gwyn, I know the kind of pain you are in, because I , too, suffer from severe pain from my IC. When you are at home, things like a heating pad, and trying to be really relaxed can help. I do agree with Donna that you need to find yourself a good primary doc, as well as a urologist. This may take some time, and you might change docs afew times before you find the one who is just right for you. I cannot imagine how frustrated and upset you must be. My uro that I used to see in Boston, recently moved to NY, but I am not sure what part. His name is Dr Grannum Sant, and he has written lots of books about IC. Maybe you can look him up.:grouphug: I just wanna hug you, you poor sweet thing. I hope tomorrow is a better day, and I also hope that you are able to find a caring doc quickly!Please feel free to pm me any time, or email me at: sherirnmom@aol.com. Wishing you all the best!:butterfly

felineperson3
05-02-2004, 10:37 AM
:pray: :pray: & :grouphug: :grouphug: going out for you, Gwyn--

Keep posting so we know how you're doing--:kiss:

Dani72
05-02-2004, 10:47 AM
Gwyn,
I am so sorry youa re going thru this alone. At least I have people around to supoort me( although they do get fed up) Gwyn, I know you are in New York right now and renting, but if you need somewhere else to stay you are welcome to stay with me, I have an extra bedroom. I live in Florida. The weather is good, it's nice to see the sun, instead of gray New York (I used to live there, and I have found some good docs. I know may sound like an odd offer since we do not know eachother but if you would like to talk about it, please reply or pm me.
BIG HUGS,
Danielle

Sarojini
05-02-2004, 10:57 AM
Oh Gwyn, I am so sorry to hear about your horrible experience at the ER!! :grouphug:

It makes me so mad to hear these stories where someone in severe pain is told to go home. :(

I wish I could help you more... I think the advice about calling Dr. Moldwin was great, but for now, if you absolutely cannot afford him, I did find the following website for the New York City Free Clinic run by NYU Medical School:

http://endeavor.med.nyu.edu/freeclinic/faq.html

Now, I do realize that free clinics can be notoriously bad, but this one is run by the New York University Medical School-- so I think that if you call and make an appt. for yourself, and then take as much info as you can on IC with you when you go, they may be able to either help you out or refer you to someone who can. Explain that you came from Singapore, exactly what you told us... and that you've been diagnosed for 2yrs.

The clinic is free of charge... and, they have people on staff who are experts in helping you get health benefits, Medicaid, etc.

Like I said, this may not help you. Maybe someone in New York can help more than I can...

I wish I could take you to my urologist :( but I'm all the way down in Tennessee...

AAARGH, I feel like my hands are tied...

Iris
05-02-2004, 11:11 AM
Hey Gwyn, sorry to read about all your troubles that you have been experiencing. Hope that you can find some relief soon, sending lots of prayers your way. Keep us posted as to how you are doing, hugs and well wishes Iris.:pray: :grouphug: :flower:

Mimi-in-Chicagoland
05-02-2004, 08:03 PM
In the US, we diagnose IC with a hydrodystention. They put you to sleep and look at your bladder. I don't think they do that in Singapore. Hopefully you can find an IC doctor that will treat you. I'm sorry you got horrible treatment in the ER, but our ERs aren't very good unless there is something really obviously wrong with you---like a missing arm.

gwyn
05-02-2004, 10:21 PM
thank you all of you for your care and concern...
i am still in alot of pain ... i dont know why... its like ok for a while--i can walk around properly and suddenly i just geta flare and i feel so much pain at my vagina area all the way up to my tummy and sometimes the back area and i just feel like peeing All the time but only a few drops comes out after the tensing up of the muscles-going red in the face pee session... i just got a heating pad.. but how do u use it?? on ur tummy?? n i am on the antibiotics and painkillers but it DOESNT hELP at all!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am still looking for a good doctor.. urghh
but thank you all of you ... your replies DID HELP ME IN MY MOMENT of depression... THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!:love:

Dani72
05-03-2004, 04:03 AM
i sent you a private message Gwyn. About the heating pad, I have a towel that is filled with rice. You heat it up and you can kind of mold it werever you want. I don't know if you can do that with a heating pad, but I have pain in my vaginal area too, so I put it between my legs and then up onto my lower belly area. Talk to you soon!!!
Danielle

mayray518
05-04-2004, 06:30 PM
I am so sorry that happened to you gwyn. Just when I thought these docs are more compassionate about IC I hear a story like yours. I went through a living hell also and I know how frustrated you get at docs who deny your pain. Hang in there. There has got to some specialists in New York who know IC. I found a good doc in Washington, D.C.

SheriG
05-05-2004, 01:31 AM
Hi Gwen:hi: i hope you are feeling better today. In regards to the heating pad, I throw mine on the bed, crank it up nice and warm, and lay on my belly, with my bladder on the pad. It really does help. Maybe you can get some aroma therapy candles for relaxation while you are resting. Also, when I flare, and hurt really bad, I tend to get really nervous, which in turn makes the pain worse.My doc prescribed some ativan , and when I get tense, I take one, and it really helps. I think it relaxes all your muscles, including your bladder. I really hope things are better:kiss: Keep your chin up, and never give up....remember what our dear friend aunie Debbie always told us..... Ther is hope!

Sue
05-23-2004, 10:26 PM
:grouphug: :grouphug: :angel: :grouphug: :grouphug:

Sue
05-24-2004, 04:32 AM
:grouphug: :pray: :grouphug: :angel:

Ginny
05-24-2004, 05:26 AM
I did not hear you mention diet. Please try it. Here is the link for it. It might get you to a point where you don't feel so desperate.
You will then be able to think clearer about your options.


http://www.ic-network.com/handbook/diet.html#list

Sue
05-27-2004, 08:13 PM
:grouphug: :grouphug: :butterfly :grouphug: :grouphug: