People think it's funny

[javone77]

I had a friend talk to me about a woman she saw on tv who had to have botox injections in her vagina just to have sex with her spouse. Needless to say, everyone thought it was hillarious that a woman would have to do that and it became a big joke. I just sat there about to cry because I knew that I have the same spasms in my vaginal area. they are so bad that before last year the only time I had been able to have a pap was when I was asleep. My muscles wouldn't loosen up even for my doctor's fingers. I turned 32 last week and I feel like I am incapable of being a woman. I shy away from men because I am just like why in the world would they deal with me and all of this when there is a woman out there twice as pretty and able to have sex without a lot of drama about it. My feelings are really hurt tonight because people just laugh at things not even considering there may be someone sitting right next to them who is going through that...or may have to.

[Briza]

(((hugs))) I suffer from the same kind of spasms you do so I know it is no joke. It IS good to keep our own personal sense of humor about the things WE deal with, but Lord knows it is hard most times.

I will tell you who the joke is on...those who are so vain that they use botox for cosmetic purposes (and odds are that some of those who were laughing do or are considering it! lol)! Think about that and maybe that will put a smile on your face;)...but thankfully not a perma-smile like you might get with cosmetic botox!:biglaugh:

And the sad thing is that even tho cosmetic botox is obviously not covered by health insurance and is expensive, it is not NEAR as expensive as getting botox treatments such as those on this board would consider, whether it is covered by our health insurance or not, considering all the money we pay for multiple dr appts for dx and tried and failed treatments!

(((hugs)))I too, am cautious of men, but mainly as a defense mechanism. But when I HAVE let my guard down I have been pleasantly surprised at how nicely men have treated me, regardless of my down there issues....helps much if I take time to get to know them well and casually bring up that I have some health issues, without going into detail, somewhere along the way, so that if and things do go to the next level then I can cautiously bring up the fact that I had mentioned health issues before and then just give them a brief rundown of my needs and regimen. Sweetie, as women it just seems to be our nature that we will always feel that there is someone prettier, more attractive for whatever reason. But the REAL men out there, the ones who are worth it, will not make you feel that way...without even their having to say it. You will just know it. And drama with sex, well, some men LIKE that!! Hey...applying lidocaine gel before sex can be a pretty big turn on for most men!! Give HIM the tube and well....;) Nuff said:)

[leelee88]

Your post brought me to tears because I can so relate!! Some people just do not understand what we go though.. (((hugs))) We are here for you!!!

[ICNDonna]

:grouphug: Sometimes it's best to just ignore them.

Donna

[SharonA]

(((Hugs)))

[Mrs. Peel]

I'm so sorry your feelings got hurt.

I guess it's all about political correctness gone exponential.

My suggestion is that Gallows humor is not a bad thing. It is a great source of expressing anger and grief through humor.

So when a group I advocate (such as the mentally ill) is the brunt of an insensitive joke, I try to remember that reality isn't sensitive, and I vent to someone who understands. Which is what you did. And good for you.

But the all-time best defense is a snappy comeback. Since I don't have vaginal spasms (yet) I wouldn't know what to suggest.

Got any you can think of Briza?