New level of fear.

[Hannah13]

So it looks like my operation/cystoscopy is May 27th unless complications with my lungs delay it. (Having some occasional breathing weirdness. Probably some side effect of one of the million meds they have me on.) If the operation goes well I'll be messed up for anywhere from 3 days to 2 weeks and in oodles of pain while I heal. (If I don't get infected..yay.) If the operation goes less than well they may have to resection and repair my urethra because it's got a diverticulum. If that happens I'm looking at a much much longer recovery period and coming home with an indwelling catheter and all manner of horrible complications and procedures that would frighten my children to observe. (There's tubes coming out of Mommy with pee in them! AAiiee!) Not to mention buckets of sheer agony for me. Cathing me is excruciating and always has been. It's something I cannot tolerate at all. To be honest my primary concern is not scaring my son to death because mommy's peeing into a bag. (He really could not handle that.) The pain is scary but screwing up my son's mind still scares me more. There's a greater chance of the procedure going well than going poorly but knowing the better outcome is more likely is not soothing my nerves as much as I would like. In fact I'm very much freaking out. I don't want to be in agony AND be a monster to my son. So please God, let it go as well as possible and those of you who pray and any of that sort of thing please do so. A whole lot. As I'm really scared.

This week I have more lung stress tests and more MRIs.

I. Am. So. Sick. Of. This.

[Mrs. Peel]

Yow! And I thought I was sick of doctors and procedures.

All I can think of to say is that I think I've got enough positive energy left to spread some in your direction. Hope it helps.

[ICNDonna]

If you explain ahead of time your children won't be alarmed. I hope it goes well for you.

Warm hugs,
Donna

[Hannah13]

Yow! And I thought I was sick of doctors and procedures.

All I can think of to say is that I think I've got enough positive energy left to spread some in your direction. Hope it helps.

I appreciate it very much. I know how hard it can be to scrape up positive energy for others in the face of ic and it's many co morbidities. Thank you!

[Hannah13]

If you explain ahead of time your children won't be alarmed. I hope it goes well for you.

Warm hugs,
Donna

My daughter is prepared but my son has special needs so it's far more complicated with him. I wish I knew how to brace him. I just pray he won't need bracing.

[katie87]

im so sorry, i cannpt be cathed either, i know how BAD that pain is, im sorry. there is nothing i can say to make it better, try and use tons of lidocaine if you can, and talk to the kids beforehand, the special needs child , maybe you could tell him that the catheter is a special pee holder that you are using?

[VickiB]

Sending prayers your way, for you, and for your son that he will be able to handle whatever lies ahead.

:pray::pray:
Vicki

[Preacher-Girl]

I am praying for you Hannah.

[maryla]

Hugs and prayer!

Blessings,

[ScrabbleMom]

Praying for you, Hannah!!!