Forced back on Birth Control (for now) thanks to IC

[icnewlywed]

So after pelvic pain for a week that I was convinced was an UTI (but culture came back negative) I found the reason for my set back toward recovery. I had set up for a DMSO treatment on Friday, but my doc wanted me to see the OB/GYN just to ensure nothing gyno could explain my symptoms. He referred to be the wife of one of his partners because of my horrible past with gynos. I spent 2 1/2 hours at the doctors office, but it was kind of all worth it. The good news, I had a vaginal infection that cause urgency and frequency and pelvic pain (sound close enough to ic)....I was started on antibiotics and within 24 hours I feel great. So I'm not gonna count this past week and say that i have now gone 16 days flare free :woohoo:

Now the bad news. My husband and I have been trying since Christmas to get pregnant (not as much trying as just not trying to prevent). In my head I knew all along with as bad as my IC has been it was not the right time. My heart however is so ready to start a family. To say we love children would be an understatement. Our neighbors joke that they are going to put a sign in my yard that reads "Christy's drop in childcare center". Last weekend we had 3 under 8 spend the night on Friday and 4 under 8 spend the night Saturday (the youngest being 14 months). We see our nieces and nephews weekly and keep every child in the neighborhood on a regular basis. All of our friends except 2 have children of their own. What is even more frustrating is everyone around is keeps having "surprise!" babies. My sister-in law is currently pregnant as well as 2 friends (all of who were trying to prevent getting pregnant). Anyways...back to my point. After a very long and tearful conversation with the doctor I agreed to go back on birth control until my ic is under better control. I am almost surprised as how devastating I find this. I get a lump in my throat every time I think about it. That night I totally lost it on my husband for no good reason and have just been sliding in to a bad depression over this decision to wait until my health is better. It is the right decision for my body right now, and it is only temporary. My periods are random (only 2 since August) and cause my ic to worsen for 2-3weeks before, during and at least 1 week after (almost a month).

I just want to have the choice to start a family when I want and not worry about my ic. I am very young...only 24....but being a mom has always been my ultimate goal. I also have polycystic ovary syndrome and have been told getting pregnant could be difficult for me. My sister took 5 years to conceive and my mother took 7 years to conceive (3 years on fertility treatments). My other sister has been trying for the past year to conceive with no success. I really feel the odds are already stacked against me and hate ic right now.

OK so now for some more good news. My previous ob/gyn had told me I would have to try for at least a year before they would assist me with fertility treatment. The new ob/gyn said once I have my ic under control that she will help me aggressively to get pregnant. She said if I was a healthy 24 y/o she would make me try for at least 6 months, but giving my ic history she would prefer to have me off my meds for the minimal amount of time possible. So when my body is ready she will start me on clomid right away to hopefully speed up the process. It was so relieving to have a doctor truly hear my concerns and take over an hour to understand my medical history. I know I'm a difficult case, but it was nice to not be treated as a freak or like I was over reacting. So here is :pray: praying :pray: I will not have to wait too much longer.

We saw my very pregnant sister-in-law (due May 16th) tonight at dinner and I just cried to my husband the whole way home. I feel almost silly for being so upset about having to wait 6 months to a year when I know many people have had to wait much longer. I have been so ready that when it came time to paint our extra bedroom I chose a gender neutral green so it could easily be converted to a nursery. Sorry for ranting and raving every time I post, I just feel like lately there is something new with my ic every day. I just want to go one day without thinking, saying, or feeling my ic.

I haven't started the pills yet on the way off chance I actually am pregnant (yeah right). I have to wait 2 more weeks and take a pregnancy test to be 100% sure. Hopefully come Fall next year though, I'll be in a better position to start trying again...why does that seem like eternity?

[ICNDonna]

:grouphug:

Donna

[SharonA]

Adding more hugs to the ones Donna sent...(((Hugs)))

[serene]

Sending you even more hugs! I also wanted to let you know you are not alone in your decision to wait to TTC until your IC is better controlled. I spent 6 months preparing to get pregnant- strict IC diet, Elmiron to kick in and DMSO treatments. My hope was to be in the best health possible going into pregnancy and prayed that maybe IC would go into remission while preggers. While I didn't go into full remission, my symptoms were not as bad as they were before and I made it through my whole pregnancy without medication which I credit to my preparation. You are young and have lots of babymaking years ahead. Take your time and be aggressive in your quest to control IC ( be willing to try anything 100%). I will send healing thoughts your way...

[icbeauty]

even though it's a huge setback right now, you're going to feel better physically, and that is what is the ultimate goal. you want to be healthy for when you do get pg and need every extra ounce of energy (and then some) to focus on that.

i had to go back on birth control after almost 10 years ttc, and even though at the time i was getting divorced and had no prospect ever of having kids, it was really rough. however, my health was so compromised. partly by the IC and partly by reproductive disorders. the birth control has given me a life without pain. i've been on it now for 2 years, and i have to admit that the past 2 years have been livable. i no longer rely on hydrocodone to get through the day. it's amazing what a little pill can do. it's a bitter pill at first, yes, esp after wanting a family and knowing the going will be rough. but if it's going to help your body prepare itself, then it's important to do it.

i know it will be hard. i think i cried equally as much about the loss of my fertility as i did the loss of my marriage. but that's how a lot of women are. we've always dreamed of being mothers and being part of that "club" that seems so foreign to some of us. but for now, you are just putting it on hold. when you feel better (and i hope it's soon, like in the next few months, okay?), you will be ready not only physically, but maybe even moreso emotionally. and this is a good time to get ready financially. start getting your ducks in a row in case once you go off that pill, you get that second line the very next month.

i'll be thinking of you. i know it hurts. but hang in there, hon, okay?

[icnewlywed]

Thanks so much for the support and not telling me I'm being crazy! I'm coming to understand I do need to wait not only for myself, but for our future family. It also has pushed me to finally make that appointment with a therapist. Struggling with so much pain for the past 6 months has made me not want to go far from home in fear of flaring while gone. I have to find ways to cope with this fear and have not been successful on my own.

[Kara29]

I know how you feel. I've been trying to get pregnant for 7 years.


Kara:pray:

[Mel53H]

Hi Kara,

Fall does seem like ions away, but I think that you being on BC pills might be a good thing. It will get the "other stuff" under control so you can have a child. This OB/GYN sounds great! I don't know, but I have always had this feeling with you that you will eventually get pregnant and have a child. Hang in there, Kara. It will happen!:smile tee

Your other mom,

Mel

[Kara29]

Woops, a miscommunication.....

Mom,

I'm not going to be on Birth Control. It flares the heck out of me. I've tried so many brands, I forgot by now. But with this upcoming operation, I will not be making love for a very long time...............

:rolleyes::rolleyes:


Kara :hi:

[Mel53H]

OH! Woops! Sorry about that! Tee hee!:)