14 months

[MakinIT]

Well ladies

After 14 months, my husband and I finally had sex last night. What a relief...Not that I haven't been "helping" him for the past 14 months but now we managed a wee bit of fun for me...i could only handle about 4-5 minutes of "vaginal penetration" and he was very careful, despite the "newness" of it for him. Anyway....I'm feeling like I'm one step closer to some normalcy in my life. (we used to "do it" at least once a week, so this has been very difficult)
I'm hoping I can figureout some other positions we can try....oh well...for now, it's all good.

:) Tracey

[Katrina]

I am so happy for you both.

[MakinIT]

Katrina:

Thanks...I am in a flare now...I hope it wasn't due to sex. I would be bummed.

Thanks....Tracey

[dyno]

I do sometimes flare after sex but I will put up with that. I am glad you and your husband had a nice time.:)

[MakinIT]

Yeah, but I don't want him to know I'm in a flare or he'd be too scared to touch me again. He doesn't like to think he's causing me any pain.

Tracey

[blue]

Very nice! I'm glad you enjoyed yourselves.

I hope your flare wasn't caused by your evening.

[sleepyangel30]

My husband is the same way hehe


Originally posted by MakinIT
Yeah, but I don't want him to know I'm in a flare or he'd be too scared to touch me again. He doesn't like to think he's causing me any pain.

Tracey

[MakinIT]

I often feel fortunate that he is understanding of the facts of my illness. but I feel terrible because I know that men, especially have a higher need for "it" than, I think, most women...although I do enjoy "it" and have missed it terribly. Unfortunately, now, I gotta pay for it...Ha, Ha, Ha...it didn't mean that literally, I meant it..well you know...I just hope it's not another 14 months. unfortunately, my husband and I don't get together very often, in something other than a sexual sense...It seems to be our only time for intimacy and we are really trying to find new ways to get together, emotionally as well. This disease (or any chronic disease I suppose) is so insidious because of aallll the ways it affects you and your family.

:kiss: Tracey

[ljl765]

The first thing my uro told me after DX was.."No sex"..and if i did,, "To use a lot of lubrication and try backwards so you don't hit the bladder. (which is front of the vagina) also, after sex urinate right away.. and rinse off..use iced jell packs wrapped in paper towels. for after burning"..which she says can occur up to 24-48 hours later". For me it hurts right away afterwards...I had to stop.
It's been y e a r s...for me.. I just can't w.o a flare and severe swelling in the abdominal area for days..Thank goodness I have a husband w/a heart who understands...Lucky you, I hope it never bothers you, but I nevet met anyone w/IC who can have sex..Are you all young?? :(

[MakinIT]

I'm almost 39, he's 41. (Wow, seems wierd to type that)...I'm supposed to be in part of my sexual peak and this is just a complete bummer...(You wanna but then the psychological part of your brain kicks in and says..."no,no,no...remember pain) The Pelvic Floor Therapy I did really helped, but it still is enough pain that I just don't know...maybe I just have to consider it getting into "shape" ....(Umm..bad visual...I'm speaking from an athletic perspective) He is frustrated, but a very mature man. Not enough to leave me or have an affair.....One of the things we have to learn to do is to connect emotionally, and if he'd just hold me and kiss me more often, even knowing it won't lead to the big "O" , I think our marriage would be even stronger. (we've been together for 20 years..married for 11) Lots of water, stress and tears under the bridge...He is so set and such a rock I can't imagine him even considering anything else. I just want to not make him feel like he's alone in his sexuality.

Yes..we do use the ol lube up job but the back position is very painful for me...no fun at all, I think cause of his "anatomy" and how he hits me. He's also very tentative until instinct takes over then I'm like OW, Ow, ow,,,

Enough graphics, eh?

Tracey