How do you prepare for formal meetings with IC?

[kerr4274]

My last question for the night. My cousin is getting married Saturday evening it is a formal wedding and they have requested everyone wear cocktail atire. In my eye, I need to wear a nice dress, hose and heels. In my IC world I need to be in something comffy, non binding. and know where all the bathrooms are and the best way to get there. I am so afraid to go to the wedding and wnd up miserable. It is hard for me to be on my feet for long periods of time,,,I get lower back pain along with the pelvic pain. This will be my first adventure with IC going out of my comfort zone. how do you do this? We are in process of moving into our new home in the next few weeks so I have a game plan for that to cover my ic and a back up plan too. I do not want to do anything that would embarass my family, they do not understand IC and don;t really have any sympothy for me when I am flaring. How have you all prepared for events like this? I am desperate now...I only have a few days to get something to wear that will look nice but also feel good incase of a flair. I seem to have them a lot more on the weekends than during the week. I wake up everymorining dreading the thought of another flare but once I get to work I can put the pain beside me and get my work done...weekends are another story..I usually spend the day flat on my back doing my homeowrk or work I have brought home to finish. It gets old! I know worring like i am doesn;t make it any better. This is crazy! I was actually trying to find a reason to not attend the wedding but I know my family would be so supset with me and I was always close to Daniel when were kids, plus I love his fiance. I need some words of wisdom here from all of you who have done this. I would appreciate any advice or help and I know my husband would too. I am driving him crazy trying to figure out what to do. I know if 'I have a flare I can do an instill before hand and take some pain meds but then I get real tired or I act drunk...this would not be good. Thank you for listening me whine about this...I'm at a loss right now and don;t know what to do.

[hdb1982]

You could get a stretch material dress, that won't be tight on the tummy, thigh high hose, again not tight on your crotch or tummy area, and instead of heels a pair of chic ballet flats. They are very fashionable and, if you find the right pair, very comfortable. I have a pair in almost every color. I love them, they look good with everything. Jeans, dockers, casual dress clothes like denim skirts and more formal dresses as well. I make these suggestions b/c when I was required to dress up for work, this was a normal outfit for me. I love the thigh highs for 2 reasons, one they are super comfy and two they are a lot easier if you are in a hurry to pee, no having to fight to get your hose down. You can find all of the things I mentioned at Wal Mart. They have cute choices and are reasonably priced. I think my ballet flats were like 11.77 or something around there. Another trick I have. If I find a skirt I like but don't want to deal with the waistband being tight on my stomach I buy the skirt in a size that is longer than I'd normally wear. Instead of positioning it on my waist I hike it up to where it sits right under my boobs. Then there is nothing bothering my stomach. I just make sure my shirt is loose/long enough that you can't see my waistband all the way up under my boobs. Hubby laughs at me and makes his Urkle jokes but I am comfy and don't care. I am so happy that I get to wear scrubs again for work. I love them, by far the most comfy thing I have ever worn. I even wear them when I am not at work. I bought a new pair of Lilac purple pants last week. My hubby washed them thinking he was doing me a favor. I hadn't tried them on yet and he removed the tag. They were about 3 inches too short. I told him to try them on and he'd see why I want to wear scrub pants all the time. He resisted but finally did. Now my hubby has a new favorite pair of lounge pants that happen to be lilac. Hope the wedding goes smoothly for you. You mentioned standing for an extended period. Surely you won't be expected to stand the entire ceremony will you?

[ICNDonna]

Panty hose have almost become out of style --- when you go to the stores, you'll see there aren't as many in stock. Most people are going with bare legs with dresses this year. Or you could go for some really fancy slacks with a satin top --- and you wouldn't need the hose. And if you did some pointed toes (back in style right now) you could go for a lower heel. You'll want to locate the restrooms there as soon as you arrive. I usually ask the person at a reception desk. Then if you need to go you can quietly slip out and most people won't even notice.

And most important, enjoy the day!

Hugs,
Donna

[mary124]

I don't dressup awhole lot anymore- but when I do, I usually buy a dress this way there is nothing binding my stomach. As to hose, thigh highs (or knee highs if the dress is long enough) is the way to go. As to shoes, I have a big problem with them due to my ankles- so I get the low heels/dressy sandals.
I had to go to my neices wedding earlier this year and I pretty much wore something dressy like this-- as to work when I have meetings, i usually wear nice dress pants and blouses.
Whatever you do, have fun and enjoy.

[allipal]

I find that knee-hi stockings are more comfortable than the thigh-hi ones, as long as you're skirt is long enough, of course. :) I don't think it's worth it to wear real pantyhose, no matter what the occasion. The cute ballet flats is a great idea-- very fashionable and acceptable for black-tie events. The good thing about a reception is that you can always be up and moving around talking to different people on your way to and from the bathroom (and it won't look like you're doing anything weird).

Be sure to eat plenty of safe food before you get there so that you're not starving and having to battle passing up the reception food (which is probably not IC-friendly).

Also, if heat is helpful to you get some of those instant heat patches for mentrual craps that you can stick inside your underwear. They last 8hrs or so.

[kerr4274]

I finally found a dress tongiht that will work. It is a simple black one. I like the idea of the ballet flats...I may even have a pair. I have explain to my family that I can feel a flare comming and to be patient with me tomorrow for the wedding, First thing I will locate is the restroom..even though here lately if I keep my bladder full i do not hurt as much...i know i shouldn;t be doing this but I will hold it for awhile just so the pain is gone. I have a follow up next week with the doctor so I will see what he says. I plan on enjoying myself...I already plan on doing and instill before we go so I know I will have a few hours of no pain or discomfort. My boss has been very understandable about my clothing choices here lately...as long as I'm at the office they are happy. I haven't miss anymore work in almost a month due to ic.....yeah!!!

Thank you all for the advice. Everything I think I understand what is going on with my body something else happens....I give up on trying to figure out what is next...just going with the flow.