Urethral burning after sex???

[Sarojini]

Hi everyone... does anyone else get really bad urethral burning after sex? I have a little pain during sex, more like "tender" places on the front of my vagina where my bladder would be... and from what I can tell, most ICers have that. My husband and I are getting pretty good at making sure his penis doesn't hit the tender spots hard during lovemaking, so while they are uncomfortable sometimes, I can deal with it.

But also, lately, I will get up to pee after sex (I was told to do so to try and wash UTI-causing bacteria back out of the urethra) and as soon as the urine starts coming down through my bladder neck and urethra, it starts burning like crazy. Then it KEEPS burning for hours after, even when I am not urinating! I usually take a Pyridium or Urised and that helps. Sometimes I also take a pain med because my whole crotch will start throbbing. After a while everything settles down, but it's a miserable time until it does!

I just wanted to know if anyone else gets this, and what you do about it. For example, would it help to take a Pyridium/Urised BEFORE sex?

Thanks for any suggestions you might have...

:)

Jen

PS... It seems like the burning happens more often and is more intense since I've started DMSO instillations. Aren't those supposed to help rather than make things worse?

[tigger_gal]

Yes most diffently I try to wait as long as humanly possible (with having IC) to p after sex, because it feels very hot and dose burn.. After sex hubby always gets a warm cloth to lay there so I don't get the throbbing pain as bad.... I too take a pain pill and a urised.
hugs
Brat

[Sarojini]

Thanks Brat... it is nice to know I am not the only one who gets that burning! :) I will need to try the warm cloth for the throbbing next time.

Jen

[yorkyloverx3]

YES The burning was bad. I have a hand held shower so I would squat in the tub and just hold the shower pointing toward vagina. The warm water helped alot until I had to pee.
It has been along time since my husband and I have attempted anything. Thank God I have an understanding man. We have been through so much in our 30 years of marriage and he is still with me. Don't know that I could say the same if the roles were reversed.
I am having a major flare up now, and feel so quilty because here we go again. It hurts to even think about sex. I HATE IC and everything that goes along with it.
If you take a valium and pain pill before, maybe you won't care! :rolleyes: Hang in there. Try ice afterward, it helps with the burning.
Denise

[sleepyangel30]

I have no more problems with sex, Only thing I was afraid of is that it would make me urinate more often, Anyway I giving it a try last night and I had no problems at all.

[Sarojini]

Hi everybody... thanks for all of your replies... it really helps to know I'm not the only one with that horrid burning after sex!!!


Jen

[PikkuMyy]

I have two suggestions

1. Although we don't want to have to take more Pyridium than is necessary, sometimes we've just gotta! So take one before you have sex with a bunch of water so that by the time you pee afterwards, the drug is already in your system and it won't hurt to pee. The best way would be to take it enough in advance so that you've already peed before sex and gotten it into your urethra. I also found that a light dose of muscle relaxant helped too.

2. Lube, Lube, and Lube some more!

The more friction, the more rubbing on the urethra, which creates the abraision, and thus the burning when the acidic urine passes over it. It's like lemon juice on a cut. I highly recommend "Liquid Silk". It is glycerine-free and water-based, EXTREMELY slippery, and stays so during, how do I put this, rather vigorous sex. It also is Biostatic, which means it prevents bracteria from duplicating, and it's vegan with no animal testing. It also doesn't have a smell. I've found that it doesn't sting at all as did some other lubes I've tried and doesn't get sticky during sex (which then causes friction and counteracts the point of using lubricant). I also find that I don't have to use that much for it to be very effective.

Hope this helps!

[Katrina]

I can't answer about DMSO but yes I have felt intense burning at my urethra after sex.....ice and water helped and it didn't last too long for me (Thank the Lord) but it does happen often.

Good luck on finding success to treat it for you.

[Sarojini]

Hi everyone, thanks for all of your suggestions. I tried placing an ice pack on my vulva for a few minutes after sex last night and that seemed to help. In addition I took a Pyridium. I had some burning, but not as intense as before, and it only lasted for about 10-15 minutes this time. Also, I've ordered some Liquid Silk lubricant as was suggested... hopefully that will help out too! Again, thanks for posting all of your suggestions... :)

Jen

[tigger_gal]

Hi all,
I too have pain during and after sex... I agree a muscle relaxer before sex is good.. I take them any way daily....
the best lube I have found that dose not cause itching, burning, or dose not have a chance to cause infection is astro-glide.. suggested by my uro and gyn..
Brat

[Dianne]

I had that but discovered in my case it wasn't sex, it was an extreme hypersensitivity I developed to any sort of "goop." I can't stand even one tiny drop of anything that might come in contact with urethra, like K-Y, astroglide, estrogen products, etc. It only took 30 secs. before the burning would start and last up to 48 hours. Then I read on vulvodynia newsletter to use Crisco and put it on him, not me, and aim him a little more posterior than anterior to keep the crisco on him away from urethra. Bingo, immediate resolution. I now special order estrogen in a preservative free base and that's working too. I don't know if that will help anyone but for what it's worth.

[curlycue]

I am glad I am not the only one going through this. I had explained to my mother once how bad it hurt and burned and she said I CANT IMAGINE and I said thats cuz you dont have this ilness, and you should thank GOD for that.

One Dr. I went to said to me I dont understand why it would burn or hurt? and this was a MD is that scarry or what. I said well let me stick -------- and see if it burns and hurts you?

I am going to use some of the suggestions on the boards.


Thanks,
Ruth:hi:

[Mimi-in-Chicagoland]

I had a pelvic floor therapist suggest canola oil as a lubricant to me. I haven't had any burning with it. I had an old saline nasal spray bottle that I cleaned out and use to dispense it.

[amaris]

That burning sensation after sex is not so fun. I agree that lubrication is key. It certainly reduces the burning. I've also tried an ice pack after I pee (after sex) to cool things off.

Sex was such a touchy subject for me. I never felt like I was in the mood since I either felt pain or was worried that the sex was going to cause more pain. I let out a small sigh of relief when I was dx with IC and realized that there was a reason for why I'd be in pain after sex. I have such an understanding husband. He agrees with me and thinks that it's important for us to have physical intimacy as part of a healthy relationship but reminds me that intercourse isn't the only way for us to do that.

Amaris

[PikkuMyy]

Amaris,

It is VERY nice to have an understanding husband. I agree that physical intimacy is vital in some way or another but it doesn't have to be intercourse. We are lucky in being able to have "regular" sex much more often than many people on these boards. However, we do a lot of non-intercourse "hanky panky". It's funny - I certainly want my bladder problems to go away and wouldn't wish them on anyone - but we do a lot more experimenting with sex and talking about it, etc. than I ever did with anyone else. We've had to do so much trying out of positions, etc. that I'm sure we've discovered things we like that we would never have discovered otherwise. So I guess there can be a silver lining in any cloud or rather, bladder!;)

[ljl765]

I just can't imagine having sex when in pain..or knowing it will burn..or any man who would want a woman to have sex w/him when she hurts..unless he is selfish.. I am grateful I'm not w/a man like that..No one should ever do anything they don't want to..for any reason period..or it's abusive to me..towards ourselves, but I wish you well just the same. It also seems to me, if it requires that much work, it's not worth it. Fortunately there are many way to feel better w/o penetration..and as you get older it's much better because you know each others bodies so well by then..if you paid attention :-) Good luck to you. I hope you put your own needs first always.

[itsjustme]

hey i have the same problem with the burning. it usually doesn't last for hours though. usually last maybe an hour the most and than the throbbing starts. it sucks. its seems to only happen if my husband ejacs. inside me. if he pulls out it doesn't hurt has bad. Does anyone know what this is and how to help it.

[Lisa_S]

I also use lots of lubrication and an ice pack after sex. The ice pack helps numb it a bit so the pain goes away sooner. If I use ice afterwards, it seems to hurt less the next day too. Currently we use astroglide, but I may try that liquid silk, it sounds pretty good.

I wish so much that we didn't have to go through painful sex. It has been stressing my marriage out since a lot of the time I am hurting too much to do anything, and even if I'm doing okay, there is still usually pain during.

[Frieda]

One of my doctors said to use some Replens at times, not when having sex. I found that did help a little bit. The only one that has helped is K-Y jelly. The other kinds didn't help me at all. Plus, this may sound a bit personal, but it only is with less or no pain with me on the top. Wow, never in my 45 years of marriage have I ever gotten this personal. Guess I won't breathe a word of this email to my husband as he wouldn't appreciate my discussion of it, but if it gives you another idea to work on to have less pain. Keep trying, it is well worth the effort!!

[Emma's Mommy]

hey i have the same problem with the burning. it usually doesn't last for hours though. usually last maybe an hour the most and than the throbbing starts. it sucks. its seems to only happen if my husband ejacs. inside me. if he pulls out it doesn't hurt has bad. Does anyone know what this is and how to help it.

i have the same exact problem.....i was beging to think i was the only weirdo allergic to sperm or something :loco:

[Selena]

I too have the pain after sex. I have to say it is usually worst if I don't climax I use pyridium and a cold cloth when it is really bad then go to sleep with the heating pad between my legs. My husband gets very frustrated and I have to remind him that it is not him its me. Then I start to feel like a weirdo. I just found out that I had IC and I am so glad that I am not the only one who experiences difficulties like this.
Selena

[Sunflower2]

I have this awful stingy/burning pain from sex. It's been almost 2 weeks. I took meds and used ice/heating pads. It seems nothing is working for me. Is there any other way to decrease this pain???I talked to my PT and she suggested that I continue my Kegal exercise and do other exercise, which is I put my finger down there and hold it for few second and slowly relase it. I haven't done this exercise for a while because I am in so much pain. I cannot imagine putting my finger where I already have so much pain. any advice ????:help: :help: :help:

[Frieda]

It sounds as if an IC flare has been triggered. Please don't let this bad time set you back from trying again when you get past it. In the meantime just go back to your what I call "square one" to get rid of the horrible flare. Use the water bottle to rinse yourself off after each urination, drink LOTS of water, eat only what is allowed on the IC diet, and whatever else you need to do to get rid of the flare. I am in my "square one" right now again.

Then prepare yourself for the next time. Drink plenty of water before sex, urinate right before and immediately afterward. Hey, that doesn't sound very sexy, but romantic music, your wonderful, understanding husband and just being together and taking your time to be together will be all the romance you need.

The longer you are married, the more you will find that just being together is the greatest bond you can have and give. It doesn't always have to be the ultimate fulfillment, but just the feeling of being truly in love with him and only him. How much you appreciate him and what he has done and is doing for you. Never forget how much to let him know how wonderful he is, even when you are in pain. Yes, it is easier to be crabby, I know. But I have days when I don't know which is worse, my spine, my fibro, or my IC, but I try to smile and not take it out on others. In our 45 years of marriage, my husband has had to put up with a great deal of medical problems.

Somehow I feel that I feel that any person that takes care of a spouse who has IC must be pretty special. We need to take care of them!!!

Sorry that I have taken all this space, but I did want to give you encouragement to NEVER GIVE UP!!!!

[April R]

It's good to hear that I'm not alone one that experiences after sex burning. I'm feeling a bit down this evening because when my husband tried to initiate sex (this afternoon) I rejected him. I know I'm going to burn afterword, and I just didn't want to deal with that this evening. I like to do it right before bed, because then I can take a warm bath, a pain killer, and just go to bed. It all takes so much time though. Why can't we just be spontaneous like normal married couples? I feel like he's irritated with me, but he says he's not. Poor man. I wish I could give him that pleasure that he desires.

It's funny, today my husband, Michael was talking about how drinking alcohol may be fun at the time, but it makes him feel so crummy afterwards, so he doesn't do it at all. Later, I pointed out to him that that's like sex to me. He said, "but that's different." ha!

[Sunflower2]

April, I know how you feel. I am going back and forth between my uro and PT. I just cannot imagine the pain after sex. I try not to think about it too much, but it's just so hard when you have to deal flare all the time. My PT told me how I have to PLAN to have sex with my hubby. Do this, and try that and so on.... Hah, I know we have to PLAN to have sex. we cannot be spontaneous anymore. It's so frustrating. I feel bad for my hubby and not getting enough action. I rarely initiate sex. My hubby is the one who always asking:lmao: poor man. Well, I guess that's a part of my life that I have to deal with for the rest of my life.