Adoption

[JOJO]

Hi
I thought there was a post about adoption. I could be wrong or maybe its just gone now. Well anyway I am toying around with the idea for now. Can anyone give me advice where to start or things to look into. I would love to get pregnant but I am 37 and with my IC I am very nervous,and also have been on xanax for yrs and at this point hestitant to come off because of the stress of having IC. Thanks-JOJO

[ICNDonna]

Just a suggestion --- but you could begin by getting a list of adoption agencies in your state --- it should be available through your Children's Services Division of your State Welfare Department.

Good luck.

Donna

[Gabi]

JOJO,

I don't know what type of foster care programs they have in New Jersey, however, I live in Illinois and did the "Foster care with intent to adopt" program in my state and adopted that way.

We also looked into overseas adoption and were going through the process when a "private" adoption situation fell into our hands. The problem with the overseas option is that it is VERY expensive.

Couples that I've known that have adopted domestically did not have great success with traditional adoption agencies. Believe it or not, the greatest success rate has been with the ones that choses private adoption by getting a lawyer and advertising in the local newpapers (I'm sure you've seen the ads). I never would have thought that this would be the way to go but it has the fastest response rate and the least complicated apoption process.

Although, even domestic adoptions run anywhere from $4 to $8 thousand dollars depending on the situation of the birth mother, and with domestic adoptions, in many cases, you have to be willing to go with an open adoption. I actually prefer this and have open adoptions with both of my kid's birth mothers.

Your best bet if you're in a financial bind is a "foster to adopt" situation because this costs you nothing and actually pays a subsidy. It can be risky, however, because sometimes things happen and you can't keep the child even in "foster to adopt", however, this happens only rarely.

Let me know if you need additional info.

Gaby in Chicago

[ICNAsstMgrDiane]

Jo Jo,

I am New Jersey and my sister has already adopted a little from China. She is in the process of going for her second.

She would be more than happy to talk to you about adoption. She is very familar with State adoptions and with overseas adoptions. She also uses a wonderful adoption agency here in New Jersy which handles all types of adoptions. Before she moved in June, four families on the same block that she lived all used the same adoption services. If you would like her number she would be happy to talk to you. Jusr email me at ICdiane@home.com

Diane