Ouch!

[GriffsMommy]

I wasn't sure where to put this but I guess I am technically menopausal now that I have had my total hysterectomy including having my ovaries removed on April 3rd. I'm not really going through menopause because I am on the vivelle dot patch for HRT. You change it twice a week and so far it doesn't seem to be bothering my bladder. The last day I have to wear a patch I might have a mild hot flash or night sweat but that's about it. I'm pretty happy about how little symptoms I am having considering what I went through when I was on the Lupron prior to surgery.
This is more about me venting about my surgery recovery. I guess I thought I knew what to expect since I had a c-section but it is so much different. Griffin was a large baby the c-section still didn't compare to the hysterectomy. I really didn't look at my incision in the hospital because I knew basically what it would look like since they used my c-section incision. So you can imagine my surprise when I got home and took a look and had a very large, very dark bruise right above my incision and I looked 6 months pregnant when I came home from all of the swelling.
Thank goodness the bruise has gone away but my incision and my whole belly above my incision are soooo sore! I pretty much have to lay down about 90% of the day to avoid adding to the soreness and pain. Sitting up for any period of time adds to the pain and I def can't stand for long which I know I shouldn't be anyway.
I just feel like this recovery is going to take forever. I'm like 11 days post up and I'm still in alot of pain and still get so tired so easily that I'm sleeping a ton. I'm a little nervous because tomorrow will be the first time that I'll be left alone with Griff the whole day since my surgery. Since the surgery someone has been here to watch Griff so I have been able to spend a lot of time in bed. Tomorrow I'll be spending most of my time on the couch. I have to admit that Griff is a really good kid and if I put on a movie for him, he'll watch it, not get into stuff he's not supposed to and only wake me up if he needs something if I have to sleep. I'm still worried that I'm going to do more than I should and make myself even more sore.
I don't even know why I posted this except to complain about how sore I am. My surgeon only gave me 5 mg of oxy ir above and beyond my normal pre-op meds. I'm happy for any additional meds but since the meds I was taking before surgery were barely taking the edge off of my pain, you can imagine how little pain relief I'm getting now.
I have my first follow up with my surgeon on Thursday for him to check on my incision. I'm going to ask him if I can get some stronger break through meds to get me some better pain relief. I think I'm also going to ask him if he would consider taking over my pain management since my specialist has made it very clear that he will not go any higher on my meds but I was having 8-9 on the pain scale every day before surgery so I would not consider that good pain management. If he isn't willing to do it then I will try to make an appointment with my family dr when he comes back from vacation.
I am just feeling frustrated and needed to vent. I realize that I had a major surgery and it's going to be a long time until I'm back to my pre surgery self but I'm so darn impatient and this is the longest recovery that I have ever had if the dr's are right when they said 8 weeks.
Thanks for anybody who has read all of this mess that I've read. I need to carry myself up to bed and take another oxy ir so that hopefully the pain will ease enough for me to be able to get some sleep.

[Briza]

:grouphug:
:hi:Christine it seems you have been through so much! I'm sorry for the long painful recovery...I know for my friends who have had the same surgery it WAS a long painful recovery. I'm so sorry you're hurting so bad and hope you get some better pain relief. The best short acting pain med I've taken is dilaudid. I take 4 mg w/out side effects, have taken up to 8 mg and that did make me woozy but not ill and probably w/ time that side effect would go away. That's all I can think of right now in the way of help and what you might be able to talk to your dr about, I wish there were more I could do. Get lots of rest and hopefully soon as you heal your pain won't be so bad. Best wishes,
Bri

[GriffsMommy]

Thanks so much Briza. I didn't need suggestions as much as I needed support. It's a really hard time.

My belly is so sore and my husband is becoming a real pain in the butt. I guess it's that "but you don't look sick" thing. He's asking me to make his lunch, my belly hurt so bad last night I just looked at him like I was crazy. This morning he came upstairs in a hurry before work to ask me where his cell phone is. I have no idea. Normally I'm pretty good at keeping track of his stuff because he isn't but hello, I'm recovering from major surgery, you need to keep track of your own crap.

Then he was complaining that he was almost out of clothes to wear for work. I'm not supposed to be doing laundry but since one of the boys is home today with a cold I had him carry the laundry basket down and I'll do it anyway. I guess the problem is I have always spoiled him and done so much for him that now he doesn't know what to do with himself when I don't do all the stuff I normally do. I told him if I stand for more than a couple of minutes or sit upright for too long then it just makes my belly hurt more and means that I'm laying down for even longer trying to get over the pain.
I told him I hate this recovery time just as much as he does but there's nothing I can do about it. My specialists nurse told me that I would have more pain for the first 2 weeks post-op than a normal person since I was a chronic pelvic pain patient before the surgery.

Thursday will be the two week mark so hopefully the pain will start to ease up. I have thought about asking the surgeon for diluded because I know how well it works. I had it in my PCA pump in the hospital and I did like how it worked. When I called him because I only had my oxycontin and 5 mg of oxy ir and had run out of my percocet that I normally take I didn't want to rock the boat too much. I was just happy that he wrote me my normal script for my percocet since I was out. I will ask him about trying different things such as diluded when I go to see him on Thursday. He seems to understand that I have a lot of problems and seems to be pretty willing to do whatever I ask. He told me he would fill out my long term disability forms if I got to the point where my short term disability ran out which will be at the start of June.

I told him I almost wish I wouldn't have the surgery from the way he has been acting lately. He said that was crazy and I needed the surgery. I know I did but lord if he's going to run around in a bad mood for the next 6 weeks or so because I can't do as much as I normally do then he's going to drive me crazy. He said he's not mad at me just frustrated but when you take it out and yell at a person who is in pain and recoverying from surgery then they tend to take it personally, call me crazy.:loco:

Oh well, I guess he'll get over it or I'll just have to deal with him until I'm recovered. I think it's really hard for me though because my incision looks so good and it's not like when I had my c-section so I had a baby to show for the pain I went through. It's very strange to go through such a major surgery, which my friend said is much harder on your body than a c-section and have nothing to show for it but the same scar I already had and looking like I'm six months pregnant. Logically I know that I had the surgery and I don't have any of my reproductive organs yet but it almost doesn't feel real. Maybe that's why I don't feel any emotions about the fact that I can't have any more kids. Or maybe it's because we already have 4 between the two of us living in one house and I don't want to have another almost 10 lb baby to kill my body even more, lol.

Anyway, thank you very much for the support and suggestions Briza. I just really needed to vent last night since it was so late and I was in too much pain to sleep. Since Gage only has a cold and so does Griff, I might leave Griff with Gage for awhile and go back to bed to try to catch up on rest.

[ICNDonna]

I can speak from experience that my abdominal hysterectomy was more painful than a second surgery I had that followed the incision that went from pubic bone to naval. I was painful for several weeks after the hyst and only about two weeks from the second surgery. Give it some time and don't do much until you have time to heal. Another week or two should make a huge difference.

Donna

[GriffsMommy]

As always Donna, I appreciate your advice and support. I'm really trying to limit my activity but I have to admit it's hard with a three and a half year old and 7 people total in our house. Thank goodness I have a 16 year old who is going to votech next year for culinary arts and doesn't mind cooking each night so that helps take a lot of stress off of both myself and Shane. He pretty much comes to me everynight and asks what I want him to make for dinner, I don't know what we would do without him.

[ICNDonna]

You may have to let things go a little for a few weeks. And make an exception to limiting TV time by plugging in favorite children's movies. Three year olds love to watch the same movies over and over so be prepared for boredom.

Donna

[GriffsMommy]

Oh yea, I know. I am very lucky when it comes to Griffin. If I put on something that he wants to watch he will actually let me doze on the couch and not get into everything under the sun like a lot of kids would do. He knows that mommy doesn't feel well and he'll just watch his movie and only wake me up if he needs something pretty much. Today I have the 16 year old home with a bad cold but he still feels well enough that he'll watch Griffin for me so I'm going to take advantage of my last day with someone at home with me during the week. I'm actually planning on going up to bed very soon and getting some sleep as my body is letting me know that I really need it.
It's funny that you say that I should let things go because I barely do anything around this house as it is since we have three teenagers and a sick mom they do most of the chores. I only do the laundry for me, Shane and Griffin and that's about it other than cooking dinner which like I said, Gage has taken over doing that.
It's really weird though because since the last dose of my Lupron about a month ago I have almost had that nesting thing that pregnant women get right before they give birth. I don't have the energy to do much yet a mess drives me crazy now when I could let it go before. It's very strange but now after the surgery I really don't have a choice, my body will only let me do so much so I have to listen to it and I do.

[leelee88]

Christine, Sorry you are in so much pain. Hopefully the Dr will give you something for breakthrough pain. Try not to do to much and get your rest. I know I will be needing a Hysto soon, I just keep putting it off. I have seen what you and Lisa have went through and that has made me even more scared. But I know it will be soon because my biopsy came back positive once again.. Well, Hope you start feeling better soon..

[lisabar36]

Hi Christine, I can tell you at 7 weeks now it does get better. I feel for you I really do, I had so much bladder pain and incisional pain. Everytime I would stand up my incision would hurt so much. When you touch that area its sore from nerves to, mine still hurts to touch the area and I am 7 weeks post op. I was sleeping a ton at 11 days to. I slept half the day away when I wasn't in pain and could sleep. I had 2 foot surgeries, I shattered a bone in my foot and I had 2 surgeries on it and they were not near as painful as a hysto. That was the most painful surgery I ever had in my life, and you feel like you will never get better, I felt that way to. I was running back to the doc at 3 and 4 weeks with issues, and pain. It takes time, we are all different but my pain just started getting better. You need to rest and sleep and let yourself heal. As I said I am just now able to do more. I am still taking naps sometimes to but at 11 days, oh I was still in pain and had no pain meds at that point, don't know how I did it with no pain meds right after coming home but I just didn't move much. I remember how bad it hurt to move. Hang in there girl, I was SO discouraged with my progress and I was calling the doc all the time, but now at 7 weeks I see the light at the end of the tunnel. :pray:

[kuntrygurl78]

Your post made me sad. I just wish I could be THERE in PA to help you. I would clean your house :lmao: Tho after Im done "cleaning" you might need help still.

I am hopeful for your doc apt on Thursday. I hope that he can give you something else to help you.

Jerry is home sick today..with a cold. Must be nice! I went to work after drinking a gallon of water for a test; stomach so swollen I had to change into elastic pants; and peeing every 15 minutes until 3 hours into my shift. Men are such babies!

I think you are right about Shane. I imagine he is just frustrated. Jerry once said to me "how is that the person that loves you the most can hurt you the worst" He is so right! I told him its because when some people feel helpless they lash out, and they feel safe lashing out to their spouse. I dont think he means it. And he will find his own cell phone or socks or whatever. MEN:loco:

You are kinda like where I was when I had a bad case of mono in high school. You are BORED and tired of being in pain. Just come on here and vent away. Ill call you later today or tomorrow. Depends on how much I have to take care of my "baby". :smile tee

[GriffsMommy]

Thanks everyone.

Ronda,
I'm sorry that Lisa and I are scaring you about having your own hysto in the future. You would probably get much better pain control since your dr does not give you pain meds for your everyday IC pain. I on the other hand went into surgery already being on long acting pain meds and a break through med. They were just barely taking the edge off before surgery so obviously just adding a very small amount of pain meds to my normal ones isn't enough to control my post op pain. But that's because I have built up a tolerance to pain meds that you won't have. Lisa has a problem where almost all meds make her sick so she went a very long time with no pain meds at all, which I still don't know how she did it. If you talk to your dr about pain control before hand and work out a plan and also have an understanding that if what they give you doesn't work they will adjust it then I think you'll be just fine. It does seem to be a longer recovery than my c-section but then I had a cute little baby to take care of so that might be why my memory is a little off. One of my friends though did tell me that a hysto is much harder on your body than a c-section, which I think is funny since they had to pull an almost 10 lb baby out of there but I didn't have any bruising with my c-section and I had a huge bruise after my hysto.

Lisa,
You have always been there to offer me so much support that I don't know what I would do without you! I know you had a really hard recovery and I feel like such a baby to whine when I at least have some pain meds even if they're not doing much since you didn't have any at all. I am just so sick of being in pain. Before the surgery it was the normal pain, now I have bladder pain and surgery pain on top of it. I feel even more sore the last couple of days than I did last week. I just keep on telling myself that it's Tuesday now and I only have to get to Thursday and then I can see the surgeon and ask to change my meds or up them or something. He seems pretty cool and pretty willing to listen and try to give me what I need so I'm hopefull there. You said it exactly though, I'm so discouraged, I hate not being able to do much at all. I already have my pillows down here to take a nap on the couch because I know I won't be able to stay awake the whole day. At least Griffin is a great kid and he'll let me take a nap without getting into everything under the sun.
Kim,
You are so sweet, if you were here in PA, you would be playing with Griffin so I could rest, not cleaning my house, lol. I have three teenagers and it's been there job to clean the house for a long time. I couldn't do it even before the surgery because I can't be on my feet that long without it causing a big flare. My MIL says the house has fallen apart since I've been up in my room so much. The older kids are fighting alot more and slacking on their chores. I will have to be downstairs at least until they get home today so hopefully I can get them to not fight so much and actually get their chores done in a timely fashion.
Sorry to hear that Jerry is sick. Men really are babies. Shane wanted me up in our room spending time with him constantly after his gallbladder surgery but he doesn't spend any time with me upstairs with me when I'm up there. He reminds me that I wasn't working when he had his surgery. This is true, but I know that he's such a baby he still would have wanted me up there anyway. I told him I just get so lonely up there by myself but can't spend too much time downstairs unless I'm laying down because sitting up for too long causes a lot of pain. He really still is pissy though that I'm not doing everything for him like I usually do. I did the laundry yesterday since I had someone to carry the basket down for me. I can only do one thing like that a day though or I'm in even worse shape. He came upstairs this morning to get something and I asked if he was okay and he said that he had to run around and make himself something for lunch, you could tell he was annoyed. I told him last night how much more my incision hurts but deep down he still expects me to do that stuff for him or is annoyed that it isn't done and he has to do it himself. Oh well, he'll just have to get over it. Once I start to heal more and have less pain then I can go back to doing things like making his lunches but I just don't feel well enough now to do it. He has a lot of stress on him I know but lord he drives me crazy when he gets all pissy and acts like it's my fault. I told him I don't want this long recovery anymore than he does. I'm the one that has to feel like crap for another 6 weeks or so.
Thanks for thinking about me Kim. I am just sitting or laying around all day trying not to do much and I always have the phone right next to me so feel free to give me a call if you have a chance. Have fun taking care of Jerry. They get a cold and it's the end of the world, what would they do if they had the kind of pain and discomfort we have from IC everyday, I think they would never shut up about it.

[lisabar36]

Oh gosh Ronda, I am sorry to, the last thing I want to do is scare you! I have not one regret now, I am so glad I had it done because even my mood is better because my hormones are not a mess. I even told the doc I body wise just feel so much better! She said thats because I needed the hysto. lol The only thing I would have done different is get the epidural so that way when I woke up, I would not have felt my bladder. The anesthesiologist told me I would not have felt it if I got the epidural and by the time they took the epidural out, it would not have been quite as bad as it was immediately following surgery. The hospital I was in reccomend dilaudid IV pump which I think it was Christine got also, and they reccomend you go home on dilaudid pills for atleast the first 2 weeks. I was fine on the IV dilaudid but once I took mine I got a horrible headache but that could of been because I wasn't taking it as much when I got home as I was getting in the hospital. Now the Lortab is great for bladder pain and it does not make me sick at all, I can even take it on an empty stomach. I do not want to discourage you and I think Christine is right when she said you will get better pain relief because your not on pain meds now. I would have to but I didn't take them due to the headache. Ok wanted to explain.
Christine, I do think people build tolerance and then its not as effective so I really hope they will give you something else for pain. :pray:

[leelee88]

Oh Ok thanks Christine and Lisa for explaining that.. Lisa glad to hear you are doing so much better and Christine hopefully you will follow in Lisas path soon and you will not be in as much pain as you were before the surgery..

[Golden Girl]

I felt so bad for you Griffs Mommy I could hardly stand to read your post! I swear I could be waiting on you & giving you hugs if I wasn't 3,000 miles away. I had so much pelvic and abdominal pain after my hysterectomy too. I was only given darvocet for pain. Like putting out a forest fire with a squirt gun I'd say. I'm sure you are so much better by now. I found putting a breathable bandage over my incision. I had to buy it from a plastic surgens office, cost $36 a sheet and was worth every penny.