Baby turned one and kids fighting

[sharon429]

My baby girl, Olivia, just turned one today. Instead of it being a joyous day it really turned out to be aggravating. I decided not to have a big party because I have so many big parties every year for my other three and at one years old they really don't know the difference anyway.
So, we decided to go out to dinner and then come home, have cake and she could open her gifts. First of all we went to three different places and every one of them were packed. I guess everyone who didn't go out on Valentines day decided to go out the next day. We drove around for an hour and finally ended up back in town at a local pub which has good food. My son was crying and causing a scene and my two girls were fighting constantly. The baby was fussy and the whole thing just really stunk. My husband said that the next time the thought enters our head to go out and eat with them were just going to have to rembember Olivia's first Birthday.
It's not just tonight either. All of my kids have been fighting like crazy. I don't know what to do about it and can't take it anymore. Everything is either a competition or a arguement. Also, like everyone else everybody has been sick on and off for a month. I'm just so depressed and fed up. They have become such spoiled little brats and I feel like it's my fault.
Sharon

[Michelle in AR]

Sounds like my life lately! I took the kids out running my errands today. I was about to beat them right then and there! The one thing that saved me was a cell phone call from my husband. He 'threatened' them for me and then they were fine. Justin is 5, Emilee is 10, almost 11 and they fight constantly. It makes me crazy. I am so glad I work full time. I could not be a stay at home Mom for anything! Keep your chin up. Spring is coming and you can send them outside and take a break for yourself! LOL! Michelle.

[ICNDonna]

Two things I learned about siblings in raising my children --- they fight --- and they will stick together any time an outsider hurts one of them.

I used to know a lady who had several children --- she said she always wanted to whack one of her kids when they were fighting --- that way the kids would stop fighting and be in a little huddle complaining about how mean she was.

Sounds like you had a frustrating evening to say the least. Sometimes our little angels can be very trying.

Warm hugs,
Donna

[Teri]

This is going to sound sooooooooooooooooooooooooo stupid and I'm the first one to admit that I LOVE having grandkids that I can send home BUT enjoy them as much as you possible can. I know when I was raising my kids I was more concerned about what other's thought of their behavior (I thought it would be a reflection on ME) than I did. I sure do wish I'd have done all of it different. I'M the one who missed out on the joys of children because I was a single parent working nights. So just enjoy! And, if you take them to dinner and there is a huge mess left behind, tip your server a couple extra bucks and that way she will know that you appreciated her.

Now, I have grandchildren. NO, they are NOT allowed to run the isles of a store or jump over displays thinking they really are spider man. BUT....if one did, I'd probably pee my pants with laughter instead of looking for a corned to spank them in like I did 25 years ago.

Love them and much as you can.....don't allow yourself to break their spirits and dance with them every single chance you get....even if you are in the middle of Best Buy;)

many many grouphug angel

[Susan2]

I wish I could go back and raise my son the way I did my grandchildren!! I babysit my 1st., grandson for 2 years, and through those two years i really saw snow for the 1st time, and especially a school bus through his eyes!! You will never get to re-raise them again, so just enjoy, they will be gone before you know what happened!! If they are having a bad day, and you get weird looks, that too shall pass. There is NOTHING more precious than those little arms around my neck, or legs. I have 2 boys.
Hugs
Susan

[Flowerchild]

Sharon 429..One of those days hugh!!! I've been a stay home mom for 12 years and totally understand. We've all been sick too on top of IC and more winter! My kids are also spoiled because I love them so much and do too much for them. There are days when I could absolutely kill them for fighting and not being respectful of "mom not feeling well" but I guess that's just kids. I think I allow to much TV which is the biggest guilt trip I have. Cable and sattelite has been a bad thing for all kids I think. And hubby's too. Have a great week with your brood and give em a big hug when you are at your wits end with them. Flowerchild wink

[sharon429]

Thanks so much everyone for your response. Things have been much better yesterday and today. We've been snowbound and playing games all day.
I really do enjoy my kids as much as I can and let them be themselves all that they want. The problem is that when they get started being silly they just don't know how to stop!! I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about. We'll be having fun and laughing up a storm and then they just take it over the top and don't stop.
About the restaurant - I really couldn't care less what other people think (unless they were really disrupting extremely everyone's dinner) but I wasn't embarrassed by their behaivor or anything. It was more that I was upset that they weren't listening to me and respecting that it was Olivia's Birthday. I don't know.
My husband argues with me that I don't discipline(?) them enouph. That they get everything they want and I don't punish them. He doesn't spend all day with them and know that I really don't let them get away with everything. I know though that it's something that I have to work on.
All in all this is the best time of my entire life. Everytime I look at them I feel so blessed and couldn't be happier(IC and everything). They bring me such joy and I soak it up everyday.

Sharon