I was pregnant but lost it.

[inlove96]

Does IC have anything to do with that or would my endo????
It has been a month since we lost our bean. I was 4 weeks pregnant so very early. I feel so guilty.

[dancemomof2]

HUgs to you, I don't think there is any concrete evidence that IC can cause a miscarriage. Have you spolen to your OB/GYN about what he or she thinks could have happened. Sending you a great big gentle hug.

[inlove96]

I went to the doc and had bloodwork done to confirm pregnancy when my home tests were saying negative after all positives. They confirmed I was pregnant low number 7 but it was positive. Then the next day I started bleeding. I bled heavy 2 days after my period was due. I have not gone back....they just said it was a chemical pregnancy. I worry somehow what if I did not miscarry??? I mean today is week 4 after M/C. And not period yet. I am confused.

[icnmgrjill]

You certainly shouldn't feel guilty here. Research now suggests that 31% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage... most in the first two months. Miscarriage is common for many women and most of us know others who have had one.

I think it's important that you not beat yourself up here. Our body is so wise. It has amazing healing properties. It has amazing diversification. Just think that a tiny strand of DNA diversifies into a full functioning body. And... for women, our body also has the ability to determine if a pregnancy isn't viable for any number of reasons. When that occurs, miscarriage is the result. Many women don't even know that they've had a miscarriage because it's so early they don't realize that they are pregnant.

This doesn't mean that you won't have children in the future. What it does mean is that right now, for any number of reasons, the time just wasn't right. Melanie, who wrote our pregnancy check list (http://www.ic-network.com/pregnancyjournal/), had a miscarriage very early in her first pregnancy... and she successfully had a baby just a year later.

Carry hope in your heart. Big hugs!

Jill :)

[tigger_gal]

:grouphug:

[inlove96]

Thanks girls. I feel ok about it now....still slightly bummed and always will be. What sucks more is my husband realized he was not ready when we found out we were pregnant. So now he has the trying to conceive on hold. :( I appreciate the love girls. I know m/c are very common, but really felt confident about being pregnant. :(

[Babs RN]

Big hugs headed your way. Jill's information is accurate. Speaking personally, I had endo(had not been dxed with IC yet)and multiple miscarriages and now have a great 6 year old. The pain will always be there, and the loss to some degree, but please don't feel guilty.

Hugs,
Barb:hi:

[RAS6]

So sorry for your loss. I hope you are healing and feeling a little better now. Hugs and warm thoughts headed your way.

[kuntrygurl78]

:grouphug:

[vm]

I miscarried at 5 weeks with our first baby. I was CRUSHED. It was helpful to know how common it was (b/c then there were other women I could talk to about it - and I needed to), but that did not make the pain any less. :( I'm so sorry you lost your baby. Your grief is real.

I went on to have 2 very healthy baby boys after my miscarriage and lots of other women I know went on to have many successful pregnancies after miscarriage. I hope this is true for you, too - whenever you and your husband are ready to try again. :kissing:

P.S. If you ever want to talk about the m/c, feel free to PM, OK?

[Trishann]

I am so sorry for your loss. It is not your fault, but I do know sometimes we blame ourselves over things we have no control of. I hope you are having a better today.

Sending hugs, Trishann

[SharonA]

(((Hugs)))

[Annie2]

I am so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately, it is a fairly common experience. I know it hurts, but do not blame yourself. It was a long time ago, but I haven't forgotten. I lost my first at almost 4 months and my 3rd pregnancy ended in miscarriage very early on. The second pregnancy went full-term and beyond (2 weeks late---ugh!). Now my healthy "baby" is doing her post-graduate work in London and in 5 minutes I'm leaving to pick her up at the airport. She's taking a break from her dissertation preparation and coming home for a short visit. Can't wait to get her home, for a little while, anyway! Many of us who have experienced this loss have gone on to have normal pregnancies. I hope that will happen for you, too, when the time is right.

(((HUGS)))

[sandramac]

Big Hugs
Sandra:cat: :cat: :cat:

[ICLori]

I'm so sorry for your loss. (((HUGS)))

Blessings,
Lori

[inlove96]

Thanks girls. I know it will get better. I really in my heart did not think it would happen....then it did. Now my DH wants to wait a while to try again. I hope my endo does not cause any problems not being on BC. Thank you girlies.

[Emma's Mommy]

hugs to you....i lost a pregnancy at 10 weeks last summer!

[shvlnose]

I am so sorry for your loss. That sucks horribly.

I lost a pregnancy at 5 weeks this past January. Is is a very hard thing to go through.

It is very possible, and pretty normal, to be able to have healthy pregnancies following a miscarriage. Give it as much time as you need to grieve and be emotionally ready.

Sending hugs and (hopefully) comfort your way :grouphug:
Alyson

[Moonheart]

Does IC have anything to do with that or would my endo????
It has been a month since we lost our bean. I was 4 weeks pregnant so very early. I feel so guilty.

First of all, I want to say how sorry I am for your loss. Secondly, when they say four weeks pregnant, what they are really saying, and I know this is confusing, is that you were two weeks past your date of ovulation, which would have been your time of your period, or two weeks pregnant. Most women don't even know that they are pregnant at this point which is why you had just barely had your positive tests, and then two days of heavy bleeding. That was what is called a chemical pregnancy. A fertilization occurs, but for whatever reason, no implantation ever takes place. So you are a month past the loss, and now you are due for your period again. You should be expecting it any time now.

I can't see why IC would have had anything to do with the loss, endo would be more likely, but it would have nothing to do with you or anything you did. It isn't your fault and you should know that many women have one or two miscarriages, may never know it, and go on to have many children. I myself had two miscarriages at 13 and 14 weeks which were called empty sac pregnancies in which the child never developed so we never saw a fetus or heartbeat in the ultrasound. That was heartbreaking and took me a long time to grieve and stop blaming myself. But I went on to have three lovely children, two boys by C-section, and a beautiful daughter naturally through a V-BAC which is very rare and empowering. :)

You will bare children and you will heal and you will go on to empower other women with your story. :)

[inlove96]

Thanks girls. And yes you are right...I would have not know if I had not tested. But go figure. :)

[Natalie41]

:grouphug: I am so sorry for your loss.

Take care

[inlove96]

Thanks. I am still bummed by this. I wish I never tested. I really do. If I did not test then maybe my husband would not have decided to stop trying and prevent. I feel so guilty for thinking he is selfish in his decision.