vaginal dialators?

[MeganAnne]

Hi there!

I have a question. Pain with sex because of IC has apparently become traumatic for me, and I've developed vaginismus (where one's muscles tighten and don't let the poor fellow in). I got a set of vaginal dialators through my gynecologist that I'm supposed to use gradually to stretch things out.

Has anyone ever used these? I've only gotten the courage up to use them once, and it stung afterwards for hours and hours.

Thanks so much! I got married back in November (06) and my husband has been so supportive, but I still don't feel any better about not being able to have "traditional" intercourse as a new wife.

[curlette]

I feel really badly for you, but it's been so long since you wrote about this and I'm really new to this, but I'm going thru the same thing with my husband of 13 years. I found help through a physiotherapist who taught me how to exercise my "core" muscles and doing this every day has helped me somewhat. However, I have vaginal bleeding and pain in my lymph nodes in the genital area following intercourse, and so far, noone has been able to give me any answers on this. They have got me taking conjugated estrogens orally as well as vaginally, but I just don't like the treatment I've been given and really feel like a guinea pig in some big clinical experiment. Hope that you have been able to solve some of your problems, dear, and keep in touch, if you'd like.
Keep well, all of us!

[MeganAnne]

Thanks for the reply! I actually just posted this this evening. I'd definitely like to find someone who can help me with the muscles; I know they're too tight and would like some pointers on how to relax. Is a physiotherapist the same as a physical therapist?

I agree; sometimes I think we are like guinea pigs for doctors! But then again, I guess medicine is kind of like a big experiment... they try to help patients by giving them things which sometimes work and sometimes don't. :dizzy: What can we do?

[curlette]

Hi MeganAnne, Forgot that you're with the American healthcare system. I think that they are pretty well the same thing, however, having given it some thought now, I think it would be probably more helpful if you could find another woman, as they tend to be sympathetic and understanding, and she doesn't even necessarily need to be a physical therapist. A good Yoga instructor or a naturopath trained in Eastern Medicines would probably be just as helpful. Once you learn how to do these exercises, and you can do them anytime, anywhere, noone can tell that you're doing them, because all that's really involved is that you tighten your butt and tummy muscles at the same time tightening your vaginal muscles, count to 10, then relax completely. It helps to learn a proper breathing method to do with all of this and it can be very relaxing after a while, given the proper aromatherapy, meditation, music, whatever you like. It has really helped me, I had the same problem and my husband and I almost ended up in Emerg. Not fun, at all, so I hope this will be of some help to you and let me know how you're doing. It's nice to chat with someone who understands that we're not just a bunch of crazy women who most people consider hypocondriacs!

[MeganAnne]

I'll try out tightening up and relaxing. Those are also the instructions that came with the dilators. Sometimes I catch myself just totally tightened up down there and try to relax, but it just goes right back to tight! My urologist says when you have pain, your body tends to clench all around it.
Thanks again, Curlette, for the words of wisdom. :)

[janelle77362]

Hi Megan,
I would be interesting in knowing if this has worked for you. I have the same problem. I have become so scared of the pain that it is nearly impossible to relax and enjoy it. This is very devastating to me because I and my husband are both in our 20s. I am supposed to be at my prime not at the end of my rope! :cussing: Please let me know anything that worked for you. I can really use some help.

[MeganAnne]

Hi Janelle77362! I'm in my mid 20s too!

The first time (2 days ago) I used the smallest dialator and it was not fun, and stung afterwards for a long time. I'm ridiculously tight down there and can't even wear tampons. Grrrrrrrrrrrr!

Day 2 (yesterday) I took Curlette's advice and really really really tried to relax the muscles down there, and when I took the dialator out, I didn't have nearly as much pain.

The way they work is that you're supposed to be able to work up to leaving the smallest dialator in for 10 minutes before moving up to the next size (there are four sizes in all). They're supposed to stretch you out and get you used to a penetration situation :) again.

I feel much more confident about it after yesterday. Now I just have to find a good time to use them... it's definitely not at the top of my "fun things to do list", but it's the goal at the end!

I got these through my gynecologist, but you can also buy them online, if you google "vaginal dilators". Keep in touch!

[janelle77362]

I am going to go check on it. I know my hubby would be happy to know that I am trying! ;)