Advice on toddler son

[anniepie1976]

Hi. I really thought this might be a place to go with my concern with all the moms on here.. I have a 16 month old son. He is my first. He tends to go to his daddy more than me. He really doesn't cuddle or anything either which I wonder if I did something wrong there like not holding enough as an infant or something. Well, last night upset me so much I still have a stomach ache. My son woke up in the middle of the night screaming. Not a usual thing for him. We thought maybe he had a bad dream. I held him trying to console him. Then I put him down and he ran into his daddys arms. I came over next to them and my son looked at me screamed and pulling closer to his dad and away from me. It sent me in tears! I'm not sure why or what I did. I love him so much! I thought moms and sons usually have a bond. I'm so scared he resents me for some reason. Does anyone else have this with their toddler? Is this normal? Is he going to grow up disliking me? Or liking me less? I hope I don't sound crazy. I'm just so upset I don't know where to go.

[leelee88]

I dont think you should worry, I have two sons they are now teenagers 13, 16.. but at your sons age hes getting close to the terrible two stage and when my oldest son was that age he was the oppisite he didnt wont no one but me, My sister had a hard time dealing with that because she was the one who always kept him when I went out or to work, and he always loved going with her, but all of a sudden he wanted me and only me..This didnt last long though and he was back to himself, loving everyone again.. I think kids just go through stages..

Another thing to kids can since in a mother if somethings bothering you, like pain, depression, being sad or angry ect .. but honestly I wouldnt worry to much, just keep showing your love for him and he will come around....:smile tee

[dancemomof2]

He doesn't resent you, as the mom of 3 and the third being 2 right now, trust me they had those spells and it will pass. They go threw so mant stages at this age. Sending you a big Mommy ((((HUG))))

[tigger_gal]

my littlle guy is 16 months too.. nearly 90% of the time he only wants me. He has a screaming fit when I walk out of the room, or go to the bathroom.
He has his spells where all he wants is my husband, and he is the one that he wants to put him to bed. I think its great that he is bonding with dad....

Jake is my nephew tho.. He has lived here for the most part of the last year. thats a whole other story. I mention this because Jake was never held, and he did not want held, hugged or kissed he actually seemed confused. My nieces theory was to let him eat, sleep and always stay in the swing. He has come around very well...
hang in there mom.. he is just now at the age wear he is learning to express him self and futher bond, and he chose dad for right now. he still loves ou very much..

[Claredale]

My boys are grown now, but my first son was a cuddler for the first couple of years. He loved to be rocked to sleep, etc. When my 2nd son came along, he didn't like to be rocked. I would have to put him in his bed and he would go to sleep on his own. He also woke up at night alot with bad dreams. He became a big hugger once he got older. My husband and I said that he was going to be a definite boob man since he seemed to like to hug my friends that were endowed! He was only about 8 at the time!!! He is definitely a hugger these days when he wants something! LOL. He is 20 now!

[Mel53H]

It sounds like that maybe he had a nightmare and maybe you were in it. I think that he will eventually grow out of this "wanting Daddy all the time stage". All children go through different stages.

Be patient, always tell him you love him, and talk to him in quiet tones and he will eventually come around.

If it really bothers you, then see a doctor about it and maybe he/she can help.

Hang in there mom.

Mel

[ihurttoo]

I totally feel for you! Collin went thru about a month of that stage when he was around 2. It was just like you described. It nearly killed me. I was so upset since he'd always been MY baby! Fortunately, he outgrew it and was soon back to being mine again. But, it was rough going for that month!

Then, last week, he had an ear infection. EVERY time in his life when he has been sick or hurt, he has wanted me and only me. Well, this time, he wanted my husband and only him! When I would try to lay beside them, he would scream at me to get out, that he wanted Daddy. It broke my heart! I cried all nite. My husband came in after Collin went to sleep and saw me crying and told me I was being so petty, that it didnt matter who he wanted and that I should be glad I could get a break from the drama this time and go to sleep. But I couldnt b/c I felt like the tide had turned and he went from being "Mommy's boy" to "Daddy's boy", and I hated it and yes, I was jealous!

But, by morning, he came back to me and clung to me all day! Still, that memory is very fresh, so I know how painful that was for you. But, he will come back to you. I know it hurts in the mean time, but who knows why he wanted his Dad then! It could have been b/c he sensed you felt bad and didnt want to bother you, or maybe he did have a bad dream and you were in it! When they are that age, who knows? But, he will come back to you. Just be patient.

I hope he comes back around soon! Hugs, Amy

[Moonheart]

When these things happen, I just think about how daddy must feel when he tries to hold the little ones and they cry out for mommy and pull away. It's a hard thing to go through but most of the time the dads just deal with it and move on. It is hard but I think it's a gradual way of getting us ready to let go a little bit more and a little bit more, over the years.

[Bessie]

I was at Church this weekend and in the pew in front of me was a family with 4 children. The dad was holding his son who was about 2 years old and the little boy was sleeping. When he woke up his mom put out her arms to take him and he refused to go to her. His sister also tried to take him but he did not want to go to her either......he just wanted to stay with his dad. I think all kids go through that stage.
octoberfarm

[Berkshire Road]

They just go through these stages when they want one parent more than the other. My daughter is almost 12, and I survived the jealousy and guilt when she was 2-3 and only wanted Daddy all the time. We have a very close relationship now.

HANG IN THERE.