Family issues

[dolphinlover21]

:confused: Hi, I have IC,IBS,degentive disc, degentive arthritis,restlessleg syndrom and i am now suffering from severe depression.oh i forgot fibro! :loco: I am having a hard time trying to comminucate with my oldest son .I am so hurt and confused by his lack of respect. I had sent him some imformation from one of my groups to help him better understand my condition. I only meant it for education .He responded back in a email letting me no that he knows i am sick that i have been sick for years now. And how he had to go threw it to and what a drag it was.And how it has effected the whole family and brought every body down and that i didnt need to remind him that i was sick.!:tsk: I was shocked by this response and went into a panic attack.I started to beleive that my whole family felt the same why after all where is this coming from?I never meant to be a burden on my family. I have been struggleing everyday with the guilt and shame of what my illness has done to my family. I feel so helpless to do anything to change it. I cant make my illnesses go away. I fear everyday i am going to end up all alone.Need support:angel: dolphinlover21

[creatingkarma]

*hugs* :tsk: Shame on your son for saying that! I know, it's hard when you try to raise a family while your sick. If you're like me, you've tried everything you possibly can to not be a burden on your family. Try not to take what he said to heart. Maybe he was having a bad day. I know, that doesn't give him the right to say those things, but it happens.

[sandi303]

I am sorry to hear your son was so disrespectful to you. Having raised 2 kids while having this disease, I know how very hard it is to do. What I learned & believe to be the key to handling this disease & still maintaining a good family life is communication. You didn't say how old your children are - I assume that your oldest son is grown & out on his own - but if there is underlying bitterness towards you due to this disease it needs to be gotten out in the open. Let them tell you how they feel, how this disease has effected their lives, too. And really listen to them with an open mind. Yes, we are the ones in pain, but our pain effects the people we live with and the ones we love. The disease is not going away - it may get better, but it probably won't go away - so all you can do is figure out a way to live with it together. If by chance right now they don't care to understand this disease & how it effects you then there's nothing you can do about that except to accept that that's the way they feel & you will then know not to burden them with any details. I am so, so sorry that you are feeling so rotten because I really can relate to how you feel, but believe me - communication, with an open mind, is the key here.

[ICNJess]

I am so sorry your son hurt you so badly. It sounds like he is having a hard time dealing with your illness, too, as though in some way it is hard for him to accept it. It sounds like he kind of just accepts it on the surface but hasn't really let it all sink in, you know?

Maybe you could talk with your family and tell them how you feel, that you do not want to be a burden, but sometimes you just want a little support. I wish I could give you a big hug, I hope things get better for you.

Hugs from WI,
Jess