AshleyM
06-05-2006, 01:00 PM
I'm not sure if I am posting this in the right area of the forums?? It's something I'm really nervous about, so I thought I would try posting it here. Can someone let me know if it needs to be moved?? I'm still fairly new and trying to figure out where everything goes :)
I have some really personal questions, and I hope they're okay to ask here. They're about being intimate with my husband. I have not been intimate with my husband but one time in about 6 months. I had major pain from scar tissue (from a previous surgery in 2004) and huge ovarian cysts for about the last year or so before I had surgery for it in January of this year. So it was quite painful for me to be intimate during that time. So for about 6 months or so, we were not able to do anything. We went on an anniversary trip in March of this year, and it was the first time we'd been intimate in sooooo long. It was a really nice trip, and I didn't seem to have too much pain afterwards. But after coming home, my bladder began to really bother me, so it was back to the strict IC-Diet for me, and I've been scared to have sex again since.
Wellllllll, fast forward to this week. I just really missed feeling close to my husband. Not so much the sex part (although I do miss it!!), but just being close with him. We don't sleep together due to his snoring and my bladder problems, so I just miss BEING with him, if that makes sense. We sort of, ummmmmm, what's the word I'm looking for....well, we kind of did other things, but just didn't have intercourse. I wanted to, but I sort of panicked and so we didn't. But I really WANT to, though. We still had fun, were able to be together and enjoy ourselves without actually having intercourse. But I miss that part, LOL :D
I'd really like to try to have sex again this coming weekend. He's off work, and I just feel like I'm ready to try. We talked about having a night, just the two of us, where we might go out to dinner or something beforehand, and then just try and relax and see what happens afterwards. I thought about lighting some candles, playing some relaxing music, etc. I know that I need to make sure I use the bathroom beforehand, and also right after, but is there anything else I can do to sort of prepare??
Also, is there any one position that is better than another?? (Again, sorry to be graphic!!) We've always been kinda what I guess most people would consider boring....we don't try a whole lot of different positions. But maybe we should, if it might ease the pressure on my bladder??
Also, is it the actual intercourse that hurts us, or is it the climax?? Like I said, I just mainly miss being with him, and I can do without the climax if that will help...
I'm just really trying to figure out how to make this work. I'd really like to incorporate sex back into our lives. I miss it :( And now that I've lost a good amount of weight, I'm feeling better about how I look, and that sort of makes me want to try again too.
Any tips sure would be appreciated. You can even PM if it's something you don't want to post :)
THANK YOU, Ladies!! I hope I have not offended anyone. I just didn't know who else to ask!!
I have some really personal questions, and I hope they're okay to ask here. They're about being intimate with my husband. I have not been intimate with my husband but one time in about 6 months. I had major pain from scar tissue (from a previous surgery in 2004) and huge ovarian cysts for about the last year or so before I had surgery for it in January of this year. So it was quite painful for me to be intimate during that time. So for about 6 months or so, we were not able to do anything. We went on an anniversary trip in March of this year, and it was the first time we'd been intimate in sooooo long. It was a really nice trip, and I didn't seem to have too much pain afterwards. But after coming home, my bladder began to really bother me, so it was back to the strict IC-Diet for me, and I've been scared to have sex again since.
Wellllllll, fast forward to this week. I just really missed feeling close to my husband. Not so much the sex part (although I do miss it!!), but just being close with him. We don't sleep together due to his snoring and my bladder problems, so I just miss BEING with him, if that makes sense. We sort of, ummmmmm, what's the word I'm looking for....well, we kind of did other things, but just didn't have intercourse. I wanted to, but I sort of panicked and so we didn't. But I really WANT to, though. We still had fun, were able to be together and enjoy ourselves without actually having intercourse. But I miss that part, LOL :D
I'd really like to try to have sex again this coming weekend. He's off work, and I just feel like I'm ready to try. We talked about having a night, just the two of us, where we might go out to dinner or something beforehand, and then just try and relax and see what happens afterwards. I thought about lighting some candles, playing some relaxing music, etc. I know that I need to make sure I use the bathroom beforehand, and also right after, but is there anything else I can do to sort of prepare??
Also, is there any one position that is better than another?? (Again, sorry to be graphic!!) We've always been kinda what I guess most people would consider boring....we don't try a whole lot of different positions. But maybe we should, if it might ease the pressure on my bladder??
Also, is it the actual intercourse that hurts us, or is it the climax?? Like I said, I just mainly miss being with him, and I can do without the climax if that will help...
I'm just really trying to figure out how to make this work. I'd really like to incorporate sex back into our lives. I miss it :( And now that I've lost a good amount of weight, I'm feeling better about how I look, and that sort of makes me want to try again too.
Any tips sure would be appreciated. You can even PM if it's something you don't want to post :)
THANK YOU, Ladies!! I hope I have not offended anyone. I just didn't know who else to ask!!