To my angel Dusty

[patricia1]

Dusty I wanted you to know that even though you are going through a hard time right now with the funeral and the anniversay of your husband's death, I want you to realize you mean alot to me and I am sure to alot of others on here also. You take everyone's problems to heart as if they were your own. I especially feel as though you are what has helped me through my revision surgery of my interstim :pray: I know your prayers and those of all the others on here have helped me so much. I know you have been through what Tracy and I have been through and it helps. Although your outcome was not as postive as what I would have hoped, I wish you could be 100% better after you had yours removed, you still are such an angel with wings already :angel: . Your care and concern from someone I only know over the internet means so much to me....Although I am still not 100% happy with my Interstim (thanks god for no more shocking or toe curling) I know for whatever decision I make you will back me up 100%. Much love and respect going your way through your hard time.....

[Dusty]

Patricia,
Thank you so much. Your words meant so much to me today.
Yes I was and am really worrried about you and Tracy. Tracy is headed for the hospital right now to get her interstim out. As her and I talked the past few weeks and days I told her I would support her on whatever decision she made. Her decision was to get the interstim removed. Yours was to try a new doctor and try a revision. And yes I will support you through whatever you have choosen to do. I still do. I feel bad that you don't have 100% results on what you want, but cannot help but believe that is still possible for you. You needed help and encouragement when times were rough and all I did was give it to you. Tracy needed the same as she was so scared when her symptoms were what those of us with damage experience..just as you were scared. I did my best to help her through it and this morning we instant messaged for a longtime as she was so scared. I try is all I can do. I have gone through much in life and still do. I guess the reason for it was so I can be there for another. I will always support you in whatever decision you make concerning interstim..and always be here for you if I can. Yes the road for me has been long but I did it.
Your post made me cry which I was close to anyway. I miss my husband so much and what we had together. He was a great example of someone who had been through much in life to and had overcome it. He died way to young as he was only 51. It was time for him to go and never could I of asked him to stay with all the pain he was in. He lived his hell in Viet Nam and suffered for it here with the cancer he got. He still always found time to laugh,help another and so on. And yes we have this funeral in the family tomorrow and then my husbands anniversary of his death on the 19th. Thats my birthday and I do not want to celebrate it at all. I just don't want to. It is hard my husband died in my arms that day. I felt more like I gave him a gift that he needed and am glad I was able to do so. I felt honored to be able to be strong enough to give him that. I like to remember that day as a day that I gave this wonderful honorable man a great gift..the one he asked for..to die at home in the arms of his wife..and I did. Now my heart grieves for the funeral that takes place tomorrow in the family. I am worried about you and Tracy and hope all goes well for you. My situation turned out the way it did with interstim and that is that. We did our best to get it out of my body before it had time to do so much damage. We couldn't get anyone to take it out. Thats why I worried about you so when you told me what had gone wrong with you. I knew however you had had good results and was pleased at one time. I was scared for what could happend, but also knew you wanted to do what you could to help yourself maybe get back to where you were with it. I would never condemn someone for doing what they felt was best for them and that is all you have done. I am thankful we met and I had the ability to help you somewhat. I wish I could of helped you more..I remember I was thinking if you did not find someone soon to help you..I was going to jump into my truck and drive down there and help get you help, as you know my dear friend lives real near you and she is always glad for my visits. I was so ready to go see her and help you as I was so worried about you. Yes it is hard when it comes to interstim and the conversations. It has hurt some and for them life is hard, and it has helped some and for them life is good. I try very hard to make sure whatever one chooses to help you through it with that product.
I cannot thank you enough for your kind words. I am glad I could be there for you and hope it gave you some help and feeling of someone cared enough. I hope it helped to calm your fears. As I remember when I went through it with mine I was basically on my own as the others were so afraid and so many were facing trouble they did not know where to turn. It was a whole bunch of us at once all looking for help. I lost track of all of them and started my own search to try and save my body.
I am so hoping that things keep getting better for you and yes what I told you is true..no matter what you choose to do..I will support you in it. Thank you so for your kind words as they are deeply appreciated.
Now we will pray Tracy through her surgery, that is going to take place here soon there in Nebraska and hope all goes well for her and that when she wakes up she notices the difference right off, as she would like to do. I think she will..I did the minute I awoke in recovery I knew the interstim was gone from my body and I think she will also and pray her body heals from whatever has taken place.
You hang in there Patricia..there is still programmings and such they can do for you to get you back where life was good for you.
Thank you once again as today is not a good day for me at all. Nor will the next few be.
God bless you and keep you,
Dusty