Sex Prior to/Post Cysto

[Laurie248]

Hi All:

Well, I'm TRYING to calm myself down about my cysto next Wednesday - not easy.

My husband and I are going away this weekend for his birthday. Because of the bladder pain I've been in for the last god, 3-4 months, we haven't had intercourse in that entire time. We've "fooled around" but no actual penetration (sorry to get graphic). This isn't, as you might imagine, the most enjoyable as we are newly married (August 2004), were previously VERY sexually active, and missing that closeness has just been awful. :(

At any rate, would you all advise not to attempt intercourse before the procedure? Granted, we haven't in the last 3-4 months, but over that time, reading the boards here, I've learned of some possible techniques to make it better: I have prescription lidocaine jelly now, some people have suggested taking a pyridium tablet or motrin prior to sex, etc. -- but would you all advise it better to wait until AFTER the procedure is done, so to not cause any inflammation or irritation or anything before my test (assuming the test will just make my pain worse)??? Your thoughts?

You know, despite all of this....I'm so desperate to get my love life back. I miss my husband terribly. And I know, we love each other "other ways" of course, absolutely, but god....how I miss it. He misses it desperately too. I pray to god there is some light at the end of the tunnel that we'll be able to be intimate again. :(

Laurie

[IC SARAH-CPP]

I would still have sex before the procedure, and especially since you guys are going away for a romantic weekend!! Come on, give the guys some nooky for his birthday, Just kidding. But my hubby and I had sex the night before my proceudre, because I knew I wouldnt be able to do it for awhile afterwards. Now, if this was after the procedure, I would definatly tell you not to do it.
But, I did want to mention that this weekend is exactly the time I wa talking about yesterday when I said try to have sex during times you know you are least likely to get distracted or interrupted. And when you know you are both willing to take the time to "fool around" before hand to get things going down there. And like any other thing that is worth anything, a good sex life takes a lot of love, patientce and attention.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up, becasue I knew you were going away this weekend. Ihope you guys have a really good time and let us know what happened, when you get back!!
Love Sarah

[Katrina]

I would agree Sarah. The test may make you less able to have sex for a few days and at least you should be given pain meds to recover. None the less there is the thought that a hydrocystoscopy is not only a test for IC but also a treatment so after a while you may feel a bit better. When you do it I highly recommend relaxing your pelvic musscles before and after with heat and non movement....anything else you can think of. Good luck!

[Sarojini]

Go ahead and have sex before the procedure. :) It's okay. My husband and I had sex a day or two before my cysto/hydro, as we knew we probably wouldn't be able to for several days afterwards. It was fine... since you're under anesthesia, even if you're a bit irritated it will be okay.

When you have sex, I agree -- take a Pyridium or Pyridium plus before the act. Make sure to use LOTS of lubrication and your lidocaine gel during the act, and go slowly (don't rush it). Also, have lots of foreplay -- even incorporate massage into your foreplay, because Katrina's right, the more relaxed you are the better off you will be. Some even take a small dose of a muscle relaxant (Valium, Ativan, Klonopin, or others like Flexeril or Zanaflex) before sex to encourage the pelvic floor to relax and ease penetration.

Afterwards, lying still with a heating pad on your bladder, or an ice pack on your urethral area can help, as Katrina pointed out. You can even use both --whatever feels best for you.

Good luck, and have a sexy, romantic weekend :)

[VAPrincess2003]

Personally, I would have sex before the procedure because when I got my cysto/hydro done I couldn't have sex for 2 months because after the procedure my IC got so much worse than it already was. If I were I would do it when you guys went away for the weekend because I've noticed for me the more I space out sex the less it hurts when I actually do have it. I would say definetly do it before the procedure and take the motrin/pyridum before because I wouldn't want to take the chance of waiting another couple of months to heal from the surgery to have sex.