traceann
11-24-2004, 09:04 AM
Hello! I have been lurking around now for a few months, and started checking the boards and finally got brave enough to sign up! (even in cyberspace my shyness is a curse! LOL :loco: I just want to thank thank everyone on here, and this wonderful site, if it weren't for all of this, I would probably not be moving forward in my treatment!
I had the frequent bathroom trips and pain pain pain 4 years ago, along with sever vulvar itching and pain, saw my gyno a million times, all to be told "huh, can't figure it out, here's some more antibiotics for you". Then it mysteriously went away. The beginning of this year, right around the time I was due in divorce court, lol, it started small...my urethra hurt when I peed. Nothing I couldn't handle, and after all it went away on it's own before, I assumed it was stress related, like 4 years ago. (Back then it went away when I went on vacation and chilled out -- probably a coincidence looking back now). Plus it wasn't all the time, had good days and bad days. But I could handle it. And besides, I have ALWAYS been the girl who has to pee constantly (can I still call myself a girl at 35?? LOL). When I went for my yearly exam at the gyno in Sept, I described how it had been getting worse, like my urethra was in a spasm and it would bring tears to my eyes when I peed, but was fine any other time. So, I was asked if my ex had "fooled around on me, cause that could cause troubles psychologically below the belt", it actually made some sense to me (yeah, shame on me, I know), since I am a stress internalizer. And the ditropan worked. I had forgotten what it was like to pee, pain free. Joke was on me. That didn't last too very long.
Just a few weeks ago, I had to make another appt with the gyno, now i noticed blood and what looked like bits of tissue in my urine...quite frightening to say the least! And was peeing more than ever. Went in - "ok, you have a UTI" Hooray! An actual name on something and a way to fix it! I approached the subject of IC with him, he had me fill out the questionnaire thingy (I even came armed with some info from this site, in my mind I KNEW that's what it was, I read patient stories here, and broke down in tears that someone else was feeling the things I was feeling!) why he had me fill it out, I don't know. He kinda picked me apart about it, I pushed the issue and felt so un-listened to. It was horrible. (I live in a VERY rural area and travel a half an hour to 45 minutes to see my doc -- one way!) so, I left with an RX for an antibiotic, and a "we'll see how this works". Great, and after I spent all that time telling him how every month before my period I felt like I was kicked in the crotch, that it was unbearable and I used a whole bottle of Motrin in one week for the pain. Nice. Sooooo, the next week when I wasn't feeling any better, I called and he decided he wanted me to come back down for another urine sample. Fine. This time all I left there with was, "yep, it must be IC after your questionnaire answers and what you've told me, here's your RX for Elmiron and a nice short little pamphlet on IC Diet --see ya in 3 months." Alrighty then, away I go, feeling completely on my own in this whole mess of pain and pee. Yippee. :headbang:
I am trying so hard to keep my head above water and on straight at the same time. I have been in pain now going on my second week straight, with this past weekend being the absolute pinnacle of it all (it's been manageable since then). I was gobbling Extra strength tylenol 3 at a time every 4 hours, just to be moderatly comfortable. My poor boyfriend who commutes up here to where I live in Michigan from Detroit on the weekends got to see the totally screwed up Tracey, bouncing between laughing and full out crying wishing-I-would-die pain episodes. Must have presented a lovely picture to him...lol. He did give a pretty good "get your act together sister" pep talk, and I found it lessend the pain a little bit anyway, he was sweet (not in the traditional sense, lol) to remind me of my strengths and that I was giving in to it, letting it beat me and that I was not going to lay down and die..no way.
I keep counting everyday, "ok, you have now been on the Elmiron 5 days" one day closer to possible feeling better". And I have flat out decided that since my gyno does not seem to interested in learning anything about treatment strategies, pain strategies etc, I am going to. And I have been. I am going to call next week (he's on vacation) and demand I get an RX for Vistaril, don't think I can take Elavil for other health reasons. What can it hurt, I have always been an allergy prone person, with getting hives just from exercising or walking in cold weather. I used to be on Zyrtec, and think that might have contributed to my "remission" way back when. And we ARE going to talk about pain med strategies, I had to call this week after this horrible weekend and I got the covering Doc to give me an RX for Ultram. I am saving those for only when I can't control it with OTC's. (heh heh heh, maybe save them for Thanksgiving dinner with the boyfriend's parents, lol)
I am sorry to go on so long, yikes, but after reading other peoples posts, I can so identify with the range of emotions you go through, this weekend, I swear I wanted punch out every wall in my home, kick cry scream and have a total fit. Some days I am scared to death, thinking will it ever get better? I am uninsured, and that half the time frightens me on it own! Sheesh, especially when I went to pick up my Elmiron...yowzers! $$$ It cost as much as my weekly paycheck! But, I got to try to keep positive, I will get it somehow, someway. And in writing this, my pain meds finally kicked in at some point, and it helped to keep my mind occupied until they did. ( I am at work, and it's hard to be pleasant when you hurt! LOL) Thank you to everyone, for "listening", you have no idea how much just writing all this out has made me feel! I am sure now that I got the very first post out of the way I will drive everyone crazy with questions, etc!!! Thanks again!!
Love and warm fuzzies to everyone! :grouphug:
Tracey
I had the frequent bathroom trips and pain pain pain 4 years ago, along with sever vulvar itching and pain, saw my gyno a million times, all to be told "huh, can't figure it out, here's some more antibiotics for you". Then it mysteriously went away. The beginning of this year, right around the time I was due in divorce court, lol, it started small...my urethra hurt when I peed. Nothing I couldn't handle, and after all it went away on it's own before, I assumed it was stress related, like 4 years ago. (Back then it went away when I went on vacation and chilled out -- probably a coincidence looking back now). Plus it wasn't all the time, had good days and bad days. But I could handle it. And besides, I have ALWAYS been the girl who has to pee constantly (can I still call myself a girl at 35?? LOL). When I went for my yearly exam at the gyno in Sept, I described how it had been getting worse, like my urethra was in a spasm and it would bring tears to my eyes when I peed, but was fine any other time. So, I was asked if my ex had "fooled around on me, cause that could cause troubles psychologically below the belt", it actually made some sense to me (yeah, shame on me, I know), since I am a stress internalizer. And the ditropan worked. I had forgotten what it was like to pee, pain free. Joke was on me. That didn't last too very long.
Just a few weeks ago, I had to make another appt with the gyno, now i noticed blood and what looked like bits of tissue in my urine...quite frightening to say the least! And was peeing more than ever. Went in - "ok, you have a UTI" Hooray! An actual name on something and a way to fix it! I approached the subject of IC with him, he had me fill out the questionnaire thingy (I even came armed with some info from this site, in my mind I KNEW that's what it was, I read patient stories here, and broke down in tears that someone else was feeling the things I was feeling!) why he had me fill it out, I don't know. He kinda picked me apart about it, I pushed the issue and felt so un-listened to. It was horrible. (I live in a VERY rural area and travel a half an hour to 45 minutes to see my doc -- one way!) so, I left with an RX for an antibiotic, and a "we'll see how this works". Great, and after I spent all that time telling him how every month before my period I felt like I was kicked in the crotch, that it was unbearable and I used a whole bottle of Motrin in one week for the pain. Nice. Sooooo, the next week when I wasn't feeling any better, I called and he decided he wanted me to come back down for another urine sample. Fine. This time all I left there with was, "yep, it must be IC after your questionnaire answers and what you've told me, here's your RX for Elmiron and a nice short little pamphlet on IC Diet --see ya in 3 months." Alrighty then, away I go, feeling completely on my own in this whole mess of pain and pee. Yippee. :headbang:
I am trying so hard to keep my head above water and on straight at the same time. I have been in pain now going on my second week straight, with this past weekend being the absolute pinnacle of it all (it's been manageable since then). I was gobbling Extra strength tylenol 3 at a time every 4 hours, just to be moderatly comfortable. My poor boyfriend who commutes up here to where I live in Michigan from Detroit on the weekends got to see the totally screwed up Tracey, bouncing between laughing and full out crying wishing-I-would-die pain episodes. Must have presented a lovely picture to him...lol. He did give a pretty good "get your act together sister" pep talk, and I found it lessend the pain a little bit anyway, he was sweet (not in the traditional sense, lol) to remind me of my strengths and that I was giving in to it, letting it beat me and that I was not going to lay down and die..no way.
I keep counting everyday, "ok, you have now been on the Elmiron 5 days" one day closer to possible feeling better". And I have flat out decided that since my gyno does not seem to interested in learning anything about treatment strategies, pain strategies etc, I am going to. And I have been. I am going to call next week (he's on vacation) and demand I get an RX for Vistaril, don't think I can take Elavil for other health reasons. What can it hurt, I have always been an allergy prone person, with getting hives just from exercising or walking in cold weather. I used to be on Zyrtec, and think that might have contributed to my "remission" way back when. And we ARE going to talk about pain med strategies, I had to call this week after this horrible weekend and I got the covering Doc to give me an RX for Ultram. I am saving those for only when I can't control it with OTC's. (heh heh heh, maybe save them for Thanksgiving dinner with the boyfriend's parents, lol)
I am sorry to go on so long, yikes, but after reading other peoples posts, I can so identify with the range of emotions you go through, this weekend, I swear I wanted punch out every wall in my home, kick cry scream and have a total fit. Some days I am scared to death, thinking will it ever get better? I am uninsured, and that half the time frightens me on it own! Sheesh, especially when I went to pick up my Elmiron...yowzers! $$$ It cost as much as my weekly paycheck! But, I got to try to keep positive, I will get it somehow, someway. And in writing this, my pain meds finally kicked in at some point, and it helped to keep my mind occupied until they did. ( I am at work, and it's hard to be pleasant when you hurt! LOL) Thank you to everyone, for "listening", you have no idea how much just writing all this out has made me feel! I am sure now that I got the very first post out of the way I will drive everyone crazy with questions, etc!!! Thanks again!!
Love and warm fuzzies to everyone! :grouphug:
Tracey